Orchid

If she were to be brutally honest with herself, a lot of it could really be to write off any sense of guilt as well. If it turned out he did die at some point, as long as she kept staying away from knowing the truth, she could always comfort herself with the fact that she couldn’t have done anything about it. That was selfish, and honestly, a little horrible. She scrunched her face in distaste at what she’d become. She could hide behind airs of nobility, of serving some greater purpose, but she knew better than anyone what she truly felt. It was all blustering bravado to hide her cowardice. Sh

The girl let out a deep breath, one she hadn’t been aware she was holding, and leaned back in the bench, looking up at the sky. It really didn’t seem as nice as she’d convinced herself it was before. There was a catharsis which came from letting out tears, and now that the moment had passed, she could think more rationally. It actually was a point she hadn’t considered before. But, was there really anything she could do about it? Once they got out, she would either have to move on, or crumble under the weight of the past. In either case, her brother was dead. Moving on was sad, yes, but

It took a while before the tears subsided enough for her thoughts to be anything more than a blubbering mess. She avoided looking at her reflection. She already knew what she would see, looking back at her. At least there had been no one around to see her. She slowly rubbed at her eyes as her mind shook off the emotional haze and returned to a subdued clarity. Today was his birthday, huh. She should… she should be doing something for it. Even if she tried not to think about her brother, it wasn’t like she was trying to forget him. If she actually forgot about him… that would be too depressing

Perhaps Haruna was being a little dramatic. She didn’t actually know if her brother were dead or not. In fact, she wasn’t even one-hundred percent certain if he were in the game. He had promised to log on and meet up with her on that fateful day, and he never broke his promises, but she couldn’t help but desperately hope that that had been the one promise he did break. There was a very easy way for her to find out the truth, but that was the one place she had avoided with all her might her entire time here. It was better to live with the uncertainty of not knowing, rather than be forced t

At times, her façade slips. The veneer of relaxed coolness fractures, and the little girl inside can be seen, huddling in fear. While she was pretty good at not thinking about it, during the time those small cracks appeared in her mask, her thoughts always returned to him. Her brother. Her leg shook. Not now, not now. This couldn’t be happening now. Couldn’t it at least wait until she was in the dark privacy of her room at the inn? She was outside, the sun was shining, the breeze was cool she was fine everything was fine- She swallowed slowly, trying to refocus her mind on other to

She looked down at her cold tea, grimaced, then quickly gulped down the rest of it. Ugh, tea was definitely supposed to be drank warm, but no point letting it go to complete waste. She cracked her neck a couple of times, looking apprehensively at the crowd outside, but resolved herself to leave. She didn’t want to stay here any longer, lest she get caught up in looking back over her journal. As she pushed through the door, the comforting jingle of the café’s bell was quickly lost in the roaring wave of the crowd. People crowded in on all sides, the loud sound of all their conversations dr

She squirmed, trying to melt into the leather chair. Hmm. She sat up a little, tapping her fingers impatiently. Hmmmmmmmmmmm. For some reason, she was feeling a bit restless today. Normally she was quite content to sit here lost in thought about whatever she wanted, but today it didn’t feel like enough. How long had it been since they were all trapped in here? How many days had she whiled away in this chair, in this café? Honestly, it was no real surprise that she’d eventually become bored after who knows how long. The last time she actually had a real conversation with someone was… she

It had become something of a daily ritual for her, spending every morning in the comfiest chair in the cool interior of this empty, NPC-run café. By now, she knew most of the town like the back of her hand. There were spots with prettier views, prettier music, but it was this spot that she always returned to. It was simple, easy to understand, and nothing unexpected ever happened. She’d watch the world go by outside the glass, write a bit, jot a couple of thoughts down in her journal, take some sips of warm tea, and wait. Eventually, one day, they’d be able to get out. It felt like an eternity

‘I’m not a good person. I wish I were, but in a way, I’m glad I’m not. It’s good people who make sacrifices, it’s good people who work tirelessly for others, it’s good people who give up their lives for those around them. It’s good people who do what they think is right no matter what. It seems like a heavy burden to bear, one that I want little to do with. And yet, I find myself captivated by their light regardless.’ The girl stopped writing, tapping her chin with a finger as she looked up at the ceiling pensively. These words were probably just incoherent ramblings from a girl just as n

Hey. If you somehow found this, then… well, you probably already know what happened. Despite my best efforts, I’ve died. I’m keeping this journal partly for my own sanity, but also so my parents know what happened to me in case I can’t tell them myself. My only request, if this thing hasn’t already been deleted to the void, is that you bring this to my family. I’d like for them to at least have something to remember me by. Profile: Username: Orchid Real name: Haruna Akiyama Age: 19 -> 21 Gender: Female Height: 158 cm (5’2’’) Background: Haruna Akiyam