[PP-F21] True Strength Is... (Baldur, Hestia)

[Hikoru 0]

Hikoru listened to the two players quietly as the did their best to comfort him, try to help him in his own personal quest. He sighed to himself quietly, wiping away the tears as they both agreed that going to his house would be a nice way to end the evening. He nodded and stood silently, pulling his cloak over him for a sense of security. He needed to feel safe until he got home, so he quietly went into his cloak.

"Alright, lets go to my place. Lets just... Follow in silence for a few moments, just to let myself process and gain some control over my emotions." He asked, with a certain tone of pleading. He needed some silence in his mind. He would talk to them when he got to the house. He started to silently walk towards the exit, hoping that they would follow. The steps echoed off the cavern walls, giving it an ominous feeling, but to Hikoru, it was home. Soon they came to the settlement of Tomoika, and they went through the gates to the area. As they continued to walk, Hikoru seemed to have a bubble around him, even though the bustling city had over 10,000 NPC's that mined and lived there, many of them avoided him. Hikoru grit his teeth, enveloping his face in the shadows to hide his face and emotions. His fists were clenched beneath the cloak, and he quickened the pace home, not wanting to go through this any longer. He quickly arrived at the ominous front door near the back of town. He let out a breath, before his legs buckled and he landed on his knees. He gasped for air, trying to control his breathing beneath the sobbing. With the emotional damn broken a few moments prior, he was having difficulty to hold his composure. After a few moments his breath steadied, before standing. He wiped away the stray tears and shook is off as best he could, giving a small chuckle as he motioned to the door

"Sorry if it seems a bit... weird, but I promise it's a lot better inside."

(House photos found here)

Photo of Front door:

Spoiler

Hikoru pressed a button, disguised as a geam in the nearby wall, and the large door opened, revealing a smaller, Spruce wood door. He opened it, and the warmth from the fire flooded the cold cavern. He sighed and his shoulders slumped a bit in relaxation. He was home. He opened went through and motioned for the two of them to enter. "Please, make yourselves at home. If you wish to change out of armor into more "street" clothes, the bathroom is over there for you to use." He said, pointing to a door to the left. He took off his cloak, hanging it on a coat rack near the door, the symbol on his left shoulder glimmering brightly. He stretched a bit as a head poked out from the Kitchen. Aru, his apprentice had apparently been taking a break. His eyebrow raised as he came into the main room. "Do we have guests today Hikoru?" He asked, and Hikoru nodded. "Yes, we do. Could you and Rolland please go and prepare some tea and coffee, after today I may need a pot just for myself." He said. Aru nodded and motioned to Rolland, who went to help the young Info Broker prepare drinks and a few snacks for the guests. Hikoru sat down at the chair next to the fire, sitting and rubbing his face, trying to keep composure. The door closed behind them, and the rumbling of the outer door closing rumbled the house a tad bit. He slumped into the chair, his body worn and his emotions awry. He looked at the two of them.

"Im sorry that I lost my composure. It seems that my emotions are a bit... sparratic." He said with a light chuckle.

@Baldur @Hestia

[Baldur 0]

Baldur looked around once they were in Hikoru's house. It was clear he had a certain aesthetic of keeping people at arm's length, nothing made that more clear than his front door, but the home itself was surprisingly cosey.  He took a minute to look around and admire it while the tea was being prepared, but then he started in with apologizing, and Baldur didn't want to let him revert and begin to put his mask back on. If they were going to help the kid, he needed to stay with his emotions raw and exposed.

"You don't need to apologize for being a person, Hikoru. We all have emotions, there's nothing shameful in letting them be seen by people."

Baldur was guilty of it as well, keeping such a composed face and an iron grip on his emotions, but that was his way. Everything about him was about maintaining control, even his appearance as an odd-ball samurai. He was never not in control, of himself or the situation. But that wasn't always true. Baldur had people he let his guard down around. He had time to sort through the things he had suppressed to remain in control. He had learned to sheath the sword. It was something he had had to teach Teayre.

"We're in your home now, Hikoru, among friends. No need for pretense, just be yourself." 

[Hestia 0]

I look towards the home as we arrive towards it with a somewhat confused look as i observe the door that is initially there, and looks as it opens up to a more cozy better door as i make my way inside after the master of shadows. 'Talk about hiding away from everything. It truly does seem like Hikoru has a thing about being within the shadows.' I think to myself the home reflecting the person rather surprisingly well for what i now know about this frontline player. A cold exterior that hides away from everything with the use of his hiding, but a nicer and warmer inside that is just waiting to be noticed by everybody. I look towards the player that comes and greets Hikoru as i smile a bit at least glad that the master of shadows has someone to keep him company at the minimum, and seemingly that someone possibly being like a information broker or someone to take over the information network if things go south.

I then glance towards the master of shadows and gives a sympathetic look towards the man as he apologizes. Yeah what Baldur said you really don't need to apologize at all. It is just part of being human is all so you never to apologize for that. I say towards Hikoru as i then just shrugs and takes the nearest seat i can find to get comfortable during my stay within this home. I glance at my outfit knowing i am still in armor as i sigh softly and shakes my head. I quickly get out of the seat i found as i make my way towards the bathroom and enters into the room as i open up my menu and switches out the armor for some simple vanity items. I look down at myself and nods my head as i exit the bathroom with a black t-shirt and grey shorts as i close the bathroom door and then makes my way back over towards my seat with a simple chuckle. Sorry i kinda forgot i was wearing my armor, and wearing heavy armor isn't exactly the most comfortable thing in the world really. At the very least it gets the job of being the protector covered easily. I say with a satisfied tone in my voice as i then sit down in the seat i was in earlier as i look at Hikoru. So then Hikoru if you don't mind me asking. Who was Lowe? He apparently knew Jomei so i am curious what he was like. Plus he had a big impact on you in some fashion so i am wondering what he was like. All i know is that he created a guild called the Velvet Room.

[Hikoru 0]

Hikoru sat quietly as the two became situated. Hestia went to change out of her Heavy Armor, and Baldur took a look around at some of his artwork and the masterpiece of a home he had built. He let out a sigh and nodded. "Right, sorry, I suppose it's just instinct to apologize for me. My job is to stay quiet on the frontlines, and i've grown used to not speaking my mind." He said with a light chuckle, trying to lighten the mood. Hestia sat down and decided to start strong with asking about Lowenthal. His eyes seemed to gloss over as the tears started to form.

"Lowe... I miss him." He spoke after a few moments of silence. "Lowe, or Lowenthal, as was his full username, was another Dagger User, and a Frontliner for a long time..." He smiled. "He, was my Master, the man who I looked up to and learned from. Next to the many other frontliners I got to know... Calrex, Teayre, Jomei..." He motioned to the Samurai "And Baldur, to name some." He let out a shallow breath, trying to calm his nerves. "I say was... because he was killed, by my ex-Fiance..." He said, and he choked up a bit at this, and a tear strayed down his cheek. He breathed slowly, gaining his breath as best he could. After a moment he felt a bit more composed, and pushed on. "When, I found out he died... I sought vengence, threatening a player associated with the woman I wanted to marry, but then I found out... I couldn't kill a soul, I don't have the spine to." He said, looking at his hands. "With these hands, and with Shadowed Path, it could make being a Player Killer so easily... But, in my heart I knew that it was not the path Lowe would want me to take, and my own morals along with that have kept me on the right path..." He said. He took a breath as he composed himself. "And that brings up another thing that connects me to Lowenthal..." He looked at Hestia.

"He was the original wielder of Shadowed Path, the Unique Skill I have. He passed it down to me before his death."

He looked down at the ground. "It was back when the Unique Skills had a loophole, where they could be traded to and from each players, like it was an 'item' of some sorts. That has since been fixed, so now its impossible..." He chuckled. "I thought it was a gift, but it's seemed to be more of a burden to bear the more I use it, and the more I continue to play this cursed game..." The sound of rattling cups could be heard, and he looked to see Aru and Rolland coming in with tea and coffee, and he nodded to them as they placed them in front of the group.

"I have a mission to go on, i'll be out for the night probably, scouting the area." Aru said, and Hikoru nodded. Aru had a sense that now, Hikoru needed space with these frontliners, and he wanted an excuse to head down to Floor 2 and check out the pub again, since it had been awhile since he had last been there. Aru equipped a cloak upon his shoulders and left the house without another word. Hikoru grabbed his coffee, and motioned for the other two. "Here, lets get our beverages before we continue further. I feel we may need it."

[Baldur 0]

Baldur looked thoughtful as he listened to Hikoru speak of his history with Lowenthal. Baldur had not known the man personally, but his life had left echoes throughout the tower. He had been close to many people, and his death had left scars on many, including breaking up Jomei and Zandra's relationship, and ousting Ariel to the fringe of the Frontline, where she had yet to be seen again. Not to mention the incredible betrayal it reflected upon Hikoru. Reaching forward, he picked up his tea with a careful touch, and blew on it softly to cool it.

"It seems you have succumbed to the curse of your unique skill, Hikoru." Baldur gave him a wry smile. It was something that they had brought up before, when he had been training Hikoru in the katana. "Your skill is to be invisible, and that it seems has become your achilles heel." Slowly, Baldur took a sip of the tea. He never did well with particularly hot teas, but in SAO at least, you couldn't burn your tongue, even if it was uncomfortably hot.

He was glad to hear that Hikoru could not bring himself to become a PKer, because he was right. He could easily become an extremely lethal Pker. However, it also made him an amazing frontliner, due to the huge spike damage and not generating thread. If Baldur had to place money on one person being able to make it to the very end of the game alive, it would be Hikoru.

"I would be careful about putting Lowe up on a pedestal, or any of us, really. We are all more alike than not. We have been thrust into a position none of us asked for, and forced to make the best of it. Some have... adjusted... better than others, but we all started at the same place. We are all just trying to make the most of our situation. How we choose to handle the situation is what defines us. There is always a choice. It might not always be the one you want, but there is always a choice. The choices Lowenthal made, the choices you make, I make, Hestia.. that action is what defines us. If you want the rest of the frontliners, or the tower, to see you differently, you have to make different choices."

He took another sip of his drink and then set it down for the moment so he could genuflect as he spoke.

"We all had the opportunity to decide who we wanted to be in this game. We all made avatars that looked however we wanted. That's what drew so many people to SAO, the chance to be someone else. But that choice is always there, it is just more difficult at sometimes than others. When we go away to college, we have a chance to reinvent ourselves, but really, the change in location has nothing to do with it. We have that ability all the time. It is just a mental crutch, and having all new introductions that seems to make it easier. We all wear masks, and we change them regularly. We act differently when we're with friends, or with family, or at work, or even with different groups of friends. Aside from the Jungian implications, it's mostly the same thing.

My opinion is that you should stop wanting to be someone else, and start figuring out who you are."

 

[Hestia 0]

I look towards the dagger user with a small smile as i take out my notebook and writes down my new information about how unique skills use to work. Knowing that it isn't helpful to know at all, but it can at least try to help me understand how unique skills have come about and where i can get my own. Not really afraid of this curse i have heard time and time again from various sources about them since i am more then willing to take on any curse if it would mean protecting the friends  i have made. I look towards the man known as the master of shadows showing a lot more vulnerability then i have ever seen in my life, and a rather interesting fact that he would wish to be seen and heard by many instead of being in the shadows like he always puts himself in. I glance over towards baldur as he once more speaks and smiles slightly as i get the feeling that the man is one of wisdom and knowledge for he usually has advice at any moment really. That or he is really good at just making these things up on the spot which is equally impressive. I look towards the man of shadows and just gives a small smile. Hikoru this curse Baldur speaks of seems to be more so a mentality you have developed from wanting to meet others expectations of what you were meant to be like. However, because of that you have come into a position that you wouldn't wish to be in and think there is no escape since there persona you have has become your life almost you could say. I'm not saying you should drop the whole rogue act since that is your build. What i am saying is that if you want to be noticed be open to talking to others openly, and finding others you can lean on for support during the most difficult of times. You need to be willing to be seen and heard and do so with pride instead of sticking to the back or backing out when you think you're not being heard. If you think you're not being heard try to be louder so everyone can hear you. It maybe difficult at first if you're not use to being like that, but change is difficult in the first place. You just have to be willing to take the steps to being willing to change to be a more noticed person by not being as sneaky, or being willing to change in a different way to slowly learn to become okay with the shadows and not being the most noticed person around. As baldur said. The capacity to change is there to be someone different you just have to take the steps to do so. I say in a gentle tone of voice towards the man as i look him in the eyes. I then glance over and picks up the tea and drinks it with a rather happy smile at the taste of it. Finding it to be rather enjoyable for myself much more so then what coffee could ever do.

I glance over towards Hik after i have had a sip from the tea as i look at the cloak and dagger user. I then glance towards my notebook that i had left on my lap as i then look towards him once more. I don't know much about this Lowe i still don't. But i do know that he must've meant practically the world to you since you view him like a hero from how you talk of him. I say with a small chuckle and a small smile upon my face as i look at the man as i turn back to serious. However, as baldur said you can't afford to put someone on a pedestal since they are only human. If you are trying to follow there path in life don't follow there exact footsteps. Since they lived life the way they thought it would be good for them to do so. You should live life how you would want to do so. Though from the sounds of it seemed like this Lowe guy might've been a bit more social then you were since he seemed to know more then just a few people. But that might've just been because he was on the frontlines for all i know. I say with a slight nervous laugh at the end realizing that probably didn't help as much as i thought it would. Having just wanted to help, but feeling like i have only made things worse.

[Hikoru 0]

Hikoru listened and nodded as they spoke their minds. He sipped on his coffee quietly, and pondered over their words. He sighed as he just chuckled, and shook his head. "You know, for a long time I thought what I wanted to be was strong, able to hold my own with the rest of the frontliners, be seen as a strong ally, that's what I thought I was. But, I guess I was wrong..." He smiled. "To be strong is one thing, but to be happy... That takes a lot..." His smile started to fade a bit. "The only people able to make me happy were Ariel... Who betrayed me... and.... Vale... We, were very close, and I almost asked her to marry me... But, she broke contact with me. She, isn't even on my friends list. I know she's not dead, ever since I noticed she was gone, i've gone to the monument every day, making sure her name wasn't crosses out..." He sighed sadly. "I don't know what happened, or if I caused her to be angry at something I may or may not have done... But, I don't think she wants to see me again... And it hurts, but i've accepted it..." He chuckled. "I guess another curse of a Unique Skill is being forever single, but I don't think that's it, as Calrex has Teayre..." He sighed and just shrugged a bit. "Sorry, i'm getting into more personal stuff of mine. Lets change the subject a bit." He sighed. "I really don't know what to talk about that isn't depressive at all however, it's been difficult not to be in my situation..."

[Baldur 0]

Baldur listened to Hikoru's tale of power and happiness and loneliness. It hit the gaijin samurai very close to home, as he remembered what felt like not so long ago, being in shoes similar to Hiikoru's. His thoughts drifted back to Tyger, and her situation. He still did the same as Hikoru, and checked the wall every day. What will I tell her family? But he pushed that thought away, and refocused his blue eyes on Hikoru.

"I know what you mean, Hikoru, about Vale. I check the wall every day myself... I think there's a lot of us who do, but I look for her name first. Then all of the others. I've gotten to the point where I've memorized where everyone's name is... and I check my friend list to make sure everyone's name is still there every time I wake up... I even... find myself randomly checking it in the middle of the day several times, just to be reassured that everyone is okay."

Baldur idly played with the tea cup and the saucer that came with it.

"This is not a lesson that someone can teach you, it's a lesson you have to learn the hard way, but no one else can ever make you happy. No one else will ever make you feel complete. No one else will ever make you feel whole. You have to do that yourself. No one wants to be with half a person... well... I say no one, there are lots of people out there, but no one you want to be with, wants to be with half a partner. You need to be a whole person on your own. Complete. Confident. Happy. Once you've found that, then you'll be ready for someone who has done the same, and is worth your time. I spent a lot of time in my life chasing after people who made me feel whole, or damaged people who needed savings, though I didn't realize that's what I was doing. It wasn't until I had grown, accepted myself, and become someone that I could respect, that I was ready to find someone who was my equal, who challenged me to be better."

Baldur tried very hard to control his thoughts. He should be thinking about Tyger, but instead he was thinking about Lessa. He spoke the words with conviction, though his mind wandered.

"You want to find someone who is your equal, and you'll only do that once you're a whole person yourself." 

[Hestia 0]

I look towards the man that i have only known from reputation alone, or from hearing about him until this day where i finally decided to try and learn about the man and what he is actually about instead of what his persona would be when out and about. The complete turn around from calm and confident master of stealth that nobody knows about and is seemingly so well put together and prefers being alone. TO instead being a man that is just broken and in need of somebody to just be his friend and acknowledge that he is just him not some title, not some class, just another human being that they could talk to and try to get to know beyond the exterior of what they might find. Hikoru i'm not as elegant with words as Baldur is, but i do honestly think that you can be whatever you want to be if you put in the time and effort and are willing to accept that the road to improvement isn't easy and that it will most likely hurt. You can become whatever or whoever you would want to be it just takes a person to stand by, and a shoulder you can lean on for support. I don't know you that much that is obvious since we've barely spoken to one another, but if you ever need somebody to talk to or just a person that you know you can count on for support i'll be their for you. I say towards the man with a gentle smile offering what little that i can feeling ever so slightly out of my league about talks of checking the monument since i don't do such a thing from having never experienced any personal loss from myself. Having seen others mourn and grieve for the lost lives that are all around, but knowing for myself that the people i care for are still around and most likely will always be safe. That the ones who have been lost to the sands of time can always make a return i just need to have faith that they will rather than think about the opposite. 'To hide fro the issues rather than face them really, but..i haven't seen them on that monument last i was their that means they aren't dead just hiding somewhere..somehow.'

[Hikoru 0]

Hikoru listened quietly, the words imprinting into his mind feverishly, hearing words of encouragement he had long forgotten that he needed to hear. He looked up at the two of them, and smiled a little bit. They had taken the time, and trusted him enough, to come to his home and listen to him finally get his emotions off his chest. It felt... enlightening. And they both brought points, things that he hadn't thought of in awhile. It made him feel a little better. But, he knew that there was one question that was plaguing his mind. He looked to Hestia.

"Just, a quick question." He looked at Baldur. "Thank you by the way, your points were correct, and something I had never really thought of. I'm glad I was not the only one that did that. Surprised I never saw you though..." He said with a chuckle. He looked back at Hestia. "When you first heard me, and when you first met me... Did I- no, did my character, live up to your expectations? It's not important, but I always wondered what people thought of me when they actually met me.." He chuckled. "It won't bother me whatever you say, i'd like your honest opinion, if you would be inclined to give it." He said with a small smile.

[Hestia 0]

I listen to Hikoru and looks towards the ground as i think on that as i can only wonder also if such a thing actually did match what i expected from the master of stealth..from Hikoru. I run my hand gently through my familiar's fur as i think on this as i think back to when i first heard about that. Well i first heard about you from Itzal. He told me about you ascendants giving your name only, and as i learned more of you the best i got was that you were a person named the master of stealth. Wasn't much to really give a personality to you know? I say with a small nervous chuckle as i think a bit more pausing as my mind tries to pull the words together the phrases that i want to say that accurately described everything i have ever thought about this man. Than i saw you during frontline meetings and...you kinda fit what i expected from what little i was given a person that wears cloaks used a dagger putting a literal phrase into actuality. So i guess i kinda thought of you as the silent guy in the back that just listened more so than anything else and only acted from the shadows and you fit that rather well from the meeting to the boss fight if i remember correctly. I say towards the man known as Hikoru not going to pull any punches upon my thoughts from what my memory can forge together even if i might be misremembering such things ever so slightly.

[Baldur 0]

Baldur smiled slightly, an amused line across his face that broke his mood into something more light hearted. It was an interesting question, that if Baldur had to be honest, he felt that most people wanted to know the same about themselves. He listened to Hestia's description of Hikoru, her discomfort was palpable to him, but it was an awkward, if enlightening question to ask someone.

"That's a good question Hikoru-kun. I think most of us wonder that as well... though I had to give up on caring about that a while ago when I donned this persona." Baldur turned his head as he sat back in his seat and offered the amused smile to Hestia as well.

"Obviously I am not Japanese, but I have taken on the guise of a Samurai. I also don't follow the code of Bushido, or at least what modern media has pretended the code of Bushido was. But I have settled into this..." He picked at the haori he always wore, the sky blue with the white flames along the edge, "... and to be honest, this is perhaps more true to myself, and who I am, than I ever was on the outside world. Some people... " his mind jumped to Heathcliff at the boss meeting, "... perhaps think less of me because of that... but honestly... I could not care less. Being true to myself is the most empowering thing I have ever done."

He looked back and forth between the two, perhaps giving away more than he had wished to do, but that was the purpose of what they were doing here. Opening up so that strength could be shared.

"To thine own self be true."

[Hikoru 0]

Hikoru just chuckled as he felt the awkwardness between Hestia and his question. He enjoyed it though, he had at least succeeded in something in his time, making a character that people could see him as. He had played his role well, but he felt that it would be difficult to keep it up anymore. With his emotions awry, and finally being true to himself, it would be hard to try and be cold, to be mean to others. He truly had a heart for them, but after so much hurt from the people around him, when it came to that it was easy for things to be put down, to be repressed. But now, he's felt some of those wounds heal, and he couldn't control his emotions now in a controlled environment. He just sighed to himself, then raised a glass as Baldur spoke 'To thine own self be true.'

"That I can agree to, although I wish I could have agreed far sooner than I am now." He said with a laugh, a smile on his face. "It's... strange, to smile again. And not trying to hide it... It's a nice change. Although, I don't think i'll be doing it in crowds anytime soon... Maybe at the next Christmas Party i'll be more open to things, but for now, I'm going to enjoy my times of solitude, with a bit happier tone..." He smiled. "Thank you, to the both of you. You really cheered me up, and helped me through a lot. I may not say it again, but know that I will always be grateful.." He said with a warm, and for once, a genuine smile.

@Baldur

[Baldur 0]

Baldur leaned back into the couch with his tea cup, raising one foot and placing it across the top of his knee. The tension seemed to have broken, and Hikoru's mental health seemed much improved, though they would have to see how much of this stuck, and how much of it may have been a lapse of mood or brought on by some other stressor. Whatever the reason, he hoped it had been useful to helping Hikoru find the next step towards being happy.

"You are doing a Christmas party? Have you done them in the past?"

Baldur had always been solitary, especially around the holidays. It was normally a time he was very close with his family, and was very busy, but ever since he had moved to Japan, it had become very difficult to see them. The flight across the pond was never easy, and going over the top was no better. It was far enough away that he just didn't see them regularly, and now he was here. He had not reforged a family, at least not in that way, though perhaps he could convince Lessa to help him plan a Christmas party.

What floor would we get a Christmas tree from? Four would be the obvious choice, I suppose.

With a slight smile on his lips at the thought, his steel blue eyes returned from his vision of the future to the conversation of the present.

@Hestia

Edited October 25, 2018 by Baldur

[Hestia 0]

I look over towards Hikoru and gives the man a smile as i nod my head as i listen to him and than Baldur with what they have to say. Well at the very least Hikoru you should try to smile as much as you can you shouldn't have to hide that smile due to what others could be thinking of you.  Also, there is no need to thank me for helping you out i am just doing what is right nothing special about that i help those that i can no matter who they are. If i can see that they are hurting or are in need of help i'll be there to support another person through thick and thin as much as i can that is what i try to do. I say in a cheerful tone of voice towards the stealth user as i than pick up my drink and finish it off with a rather satisfied and happy sigh as i do so since it was rather delicious. I glance towards my familiar who has taken a nap by my feet as i just smile softly at the sight of my slumbering lion as i leave him be for now until i get kicked out of the house or until it gets to late for me to stay out. Christmas party? I haven't been to one of those except that one at Guardians of the New Dawn just because it was open to anyone.  But i guess i shouldn't be to surprised that other guilds hold more private parties. What are Ascendant parties like? I ask Hikoru curiously.

@Hikoru

[Hikoru 0]

Hikoru smiled and shook his head no. He hadn't held a Christmas Party in his home before, as he had barely gotten his home in the first place. He just sighed and gave a chuckle. "No, not in my time here. I usually am invited to some, but few I actually attend." He spoke, then his smile faded a tad as Hestia asked about the Ascendants and their parties. "Well, we never really had any... It was always training for me, so even if they had some, I usually didn't make it... And now that I'm a Solo Player, I haven't been to any sort of party in awhile.." He smiled a bit more. "So I thought it would be nice to open my home for others to come. Now, I can't change the door and how it looks, but my home is cozy enough... Plus, I'm waiting for the chance to put a nice Christmas tree in the living room, and putting up garland and tinsel..." He blushed a bit "Sorry, I enjoy decorating for Christmas... I used to always do it at home, and I kinda miss doing it with my family..." He chuckled, and a small tear streamed down his face as the memories of decorating for the season flooded back, seeing his mother, father, and little brother laugh and smile as they decorated the tree and throw tinsel on each other. The memories were bittersweet, but he still had hope that he would see them again.

[Baldur 0]

"I think you should do it." Baldur said as he sat back into the couch and sipped at his tea.

"Let people in, physically and metaphorically. Keep it small though, people you feel comfortable around. It would be good... and you know what? Invite them over to help decorate. You may not be with the family you were born to, but you can be with the family you choose."

Baldur smiled over at Hestia as well.

"You're in a guild, aren't you? Dragon Alliance or something, right? I never see you guys move as a group. Do you socialize together in your guild hall?"

Baldur really was ignorant of guilds. He knew of a couple, mostly the ones that revolved around the frontline, but he rarely engaged with guilds as a guild, and never really went out with guilds, either, other than the Knights of the Blood Oath.

"I miss holiday decorations too. But some day, when we find a floor I want to make my home on, I'll try to do the same."

He had been to all the floors, though some only a little, but had not found a floor he wanted to make his home. He was surprised they hadn't come across some more variations. But floors did seem to come in waves of being peaceful, or being dark and bleak.

[Hestia 0]

I smile ever so slightly at hearing the fact that the former man that i could only call a aloof assassin at best has revealed this entirely different side of himself within a singular day and even revealed a love of christmas alongside that. Smiling towards the famous dagger user i just nod my head to him as i than glance towards Baldur and chuckles a bit at him trying to guess my guild's name as i just nod my head politely. Yeah the Holy Dragon Alliance is the guild's name run by Jomei. Also us moving as a group? Not really something we do often very rarely does more than two of us travel together. I mainly hangout with Ruby and Kimi mainly haven't had much chances to talk to Jomei, or even Spencer in quite awhile outside of boss meetings sadly, and for Spencer i haven't tried sending him a message in quite a bit sadly. Plus we don't even have a guild hall i have the funds to get one but i don't want to go out buying a random hall that they wouldn't maybe even want to begin with. Not even getting into talks about the style of it. I say with a small chuckle trying to make a joke out of that as i look between the two other frontliners besides me as i nod my head slightly at the mutual thoughts about the holidays. Yeah Christmas was always nice. I am wondering how many christmas' have gone by with just my mom and sis. I say softly towards myself as i look down.

[Hikoru 0]

Hikoru listened and nodded. "That's how guilds usually work I'm afraid. I've been in many of them, and in each one, every single one gets its groups of people who explore without the others. With the CA, it was mostly Itzal and Morg together, along with Kaiser. Then it was Shield and Beat, because you can't rip those two apart. And for me... it was Beatbox..." He smiled with a bittersweet look in his eyes. "He was a bright kid, working hard and always aiming for the top. He never backed down for a challenge, and when we worked together, nothing could stop us..." He spoke with a smile, but it faded quickly. "That is, however, until he went for suicide, to try and fight that.... man, who killed him in cold blood." He shook his head, then looked at the others. "Sorry, didn't mean to get off topic, just sent me down a memory.." He chuckled. "Anyways, I need a refill on my cup. Excuse me." He spoke, then went out to the kitchen to grab another cup, a tear or two streaming down his face as the memories hit him again. He saw Beatbox like a brother, a little brother he watched grow up and become a man. It was tough to think about, but he knew that he had cried enough for one day. He wiped away the tears as he came back a few moments later and sat down. "So, what have you all been preparing for lately?"

[Baldur 0]

Baldur watched Hikoru walk off, and turned to look at Hestia for a moment as well. Baldur had known Beatbox was dead, but never knew anything about suicide. He had gone on a suicide mission against this Death_Adder perhaps? The name tugged at the edges of his memory, but the gaijin samurai could not place the name anywhere in his memory. Hikoru came back a moment later, a bit more composed, and while Baldur wanted to ask more about Beatbox, he did not want to unsettle the Master of Shadows more.

"Truth be told, I have no been up to much. I have been working on trying to refill some supplies for future raid fights, and trying to reconnect a bit with some of my friends. I realize that I had not been engaging with the people that I felt were important in quite a while. In a situation like we're in, where every day could be our last, it is important to make sure that the people who are important to us, know that."

He smiled at the two of them, taking a sip, and realizing that he was pulling things down a bit more somber, but it was hard to avoid that feeling as well in their line of work.

"I am looking forward to Christmas as well. I love seeing all the activity on the 4th floor. I meet a lot of new people every year."