[F01-PP] Of Iron and Fire

[Bismarck 0]

Jace had mixed feelings about Aincrad's sky, so why did he keep visiting it? Glistening white clouds billowed past him, framed by the bright blue background that periodically interrupted their chaotic spires. It was as if he could reach out and touch them were Aincrad's balcony to extend another fifteen feet or so. A beautiful sight, perhaps even a deadly one. Briefly a disturbing thought flashed across his mind. Had anyone ever died like that? Accidentally falling off as they literally reached for the sky, just to see if they could touch the clouds? What a tragedy that would be. He doubted it, such a thing could never happen outside the bounds of a drama. Then again he knew of many seemingly impossible tragedies that were very much real. They were often intimately entwined with his favorite parts of history, after all.

The thought sent a shiver down his spine. Reflexively Jace took a small step back from the railing, the only thing standing between him and his own tragic accident. He had picked such a peaceful, secluded spot to escape the fear of death. Not stoke it. The young man rocked back on his heels, taking in a deep breath, before exhaling as he gently pushed himself back against the rails. Leaning forward to stare down at the endless blue below. It was a little disorienting, with nothing but sky surrounding his point of view. There was something enticing about that, though. How much more exciting would the skies of Aincrad be if it really was just the skies? If players could fly and fight among that great expanse? A war in the clouds, with the endless sky as the only limit.

What a double edged sword his mind had become. With the thrilling concept finding birth within his head, so too came the familiar fog of melancholy. The freedom of flight seemed antithetical to the way he'd lived his life within SAO. Was he still that kind of person? Sometimes he felt like a shell, a hollow remnant of the eager young man he'd once been. Kept alive only by sheer force of selfishness alone. Jace forced his eyes closed, cutting off the image of the sky as he furrowed his brow. What was he doing? Wasn't the point of going all the way out there to avoid the things that provoked those kinds of thoughts? He took another deep breath, clenching his fists and tensing his shoulders, before releasing it all in a heavy sigh. Once more his bright blue eyes opened to meet the blue skies below.

Perhaps he was right, perhaps those beautiful skies really were dangerous. Though not for the reason he'd initially entertained.

@Lessa

[Lessa 1]

She watched him, hands fisted tightly at her sides, lips drawn into a thin line. It wasn't until her vision began to waver that Lessa realized she was holding her breath; she expelled it in a long whoosh. "You need to stop," she whispered to herself, voice breathy and only just audible. "You can't just police these balconies, stopping people from jumping." The slight breeze tugged the words from her lips and sent them drifting through the empty park. How odd it was, that the public place would be abandoned, save for two individuals. And how strange, that one would perch at the edge of the world, and the other would be so terrified at the mere sight of it.

She exhaled again, then reached both hands up to scrub at her tired face. The decision to cut through the park on her way home for the night was one she was beginning to regret. At her hip, Riker gave a rumble of anticipation deep in his throat. The sound, rich and low, was the wolf equivalent of a toddler stomping his foot. Let's get a move on, the familiar seemed to say. Dinner was waiting. And she was incredibly tempted to oblige him.

You can't save them all, someone had told her.

And yet, she would keep on trying.

Maybe she just would never learn, and that notion circled her thoughts as she slowly approached the other player. That same breeze toyed with his blonde hair, sending it fluttering around his head, and giving him a look of momentary madness. Lessa hoped it was madness in appearance only.

"Uh, hey," she called out, remaining a good distance away. The last thing that she wished to do was sneak up on him, and startle him over the edge. "Everything okay with you?"

 

[Bismarck 0]

Immediately the young man straightened his posture, turning as a girl's voice called out to him. His icy blue gaze seeking out the person who'd caught him at a less than proud moment. He hadn't expected his solitude to be interrupted so soon. Although it didn't take much thought to figure out why she'd approached him, especially considering her words. Especially considering her distance. Of course Jace probably looked like everyone else who had stood alone on that edge. No doubt the girl knew what that usually meant. This was an encounter he never thought he'd have. It spoke volumes about his state of mind, that someone else would make such an assumption about him. The realization sent a stab of dismay through his heart. Did he really look like that?

He took another deep breath, letting it out in a much lighter sigh as he stepped away from the edge, only leaving a single hand to rest on the railing. Then he forced a friendly smile, responding with a lie in a similarly friendly tone. "Yeah, I'm fine." From the looks of her, and judging by her familiar, she looked to be a more experienced player. Someone who hadn't wasted her time. Of course he was going to lie to her. The feelings such a person stirred within him were bad enough, the regret and envy from what felt like years of empty stagnation. How unbearable would it be if someone like that came to pity him?

"What's brought you all the way out here?" Jace asked, glancing at the cloudy mountains shifting beside them. Just outside their reach. "Sightseeing? It's a pretty day, the weather outside Aincrad can actually be pretty impressive." It was better to keep her from pursuing the issue, to change the subject. If he was lucky maybe he'd get a decent conversation out of it. Something to pull his thoughts away from the edge, away from all that wasted time that kept crashing down on his shoulders.

@Lessa

[Lessa 1]

Something in his smile suggested he wasn't being entirely truthful with her. There was an unease that lurked just below his friendly tone, and a forced nature to the easy way with which he regarded her. Of course, it was no business of hers if he was really alright or not. She was a complete stranger, asking him what could be construed as a deeply personal question. Was everything okay with him? No, of course not. He was trapped inside a video game with a very real punishment of death. She figured that no one could say, with complete certainty, that everything was alright. So why did she ask it of him?

Lessa shook her head slightly, as if trying to erase the jumbled thoughts. She used to have quite a knack for interacting with people, but years of solitude had made her rusty. "Ah, no, not sight seeing," she told him, "just cutting through on my way home." Her blue eyes swept over the abandoned park before she added, "Honestly, I'm a little surprised that we're the only ones out today. You're right, it's really nice out." The sun would be setting soon, and the vibrant blue sky would explode into exquisite reds and golds. Sunsets had always captivated Lessa, but in Aincrad, they were even more magnificent.

She shifted her weight from one foot to the other, and took a moment to look the boy over. He certainly didn't have "I'm about to jump" tattooed across his forehead, but players were rarely that transparent before they jumped. The emotions that raged within them, destructive and consuming, were often masked by something more tame. But how would she feel if she turned her back on him now, and he still took his own life? She simply could not take that risk. "My name is Lessa, by the way. My familiar's name is Riker."

@Bismarck

 

[Bismarck 0]

Of course she wasn't there to see the sights, why would an experienced player like her go sightseeing on the first floor? There were undoubtedly many far more interesting places to visit farther up. Places he would never see.

Jace had to take another breath, had to catch himself. Day by day it was getting easier to fall prey to that kind of thinking. There was a time when he would've dismissed such notions out of hand. Better yet, he would've cut them from his mind before they even formed. Maybe he really had lost sight of himself. The slender fingers of his hand curled violently around the railing, his knuckles turning white from the pressure. Just a bit of venting while he tried to continue the conversation. Hopefully the girl, Lessa, was too far away to see it.

"You live on the first floor?" He asked, wondering why a higher leveled player would bother living so far down. It would put her away from the front lines, away from any valuable quests, and away from all of the better NPC vendors. To him there wasn't really a reason to purchase a house all the way at the bottom. Unless of course she just liked the aesthetic of the place or something. "Never thought anyone would choose to be down here, honestly." Jace let out a short chuckle at this, letting the grim irony entertain him a bit. The first floor was the last place he'd ever think to live in.

Finally he let go of the railing, his long legs casually closing the distance that Lessa apparently hadn't wanted to cover. He stuck out his hand once they were close enough, meeting her blue eyes with the icy hue of his own gaze, keeping up that smile of his all the while. The same old social routine. Sometimes it felt like that was the only thing he did anymore. "I'm Bismarck." He stated, still keeping up that friendly mask in both expression and voice.

@Lessa

[Lessa 1]

Her smile faltered a bit, but only briefly, like a flame flickering beneath a strong breeze. "Well," she began slowly, choosing her words with great care, "home probably isn't really the right term for it. I was just going to in an inn I like, to hunker down for the evening." In truth, though Lessa had a guild hall and a small piece of land on the upper floors, she found occasional comfort in the familiar and busy lower streets. How she could possibly begin to explain that to someone else, however, she had no idea. "I was down here doing a little shopping, and figured I'd just stay here." The happy expression did not reach her eyes as she added, "I suppose it's a bit like being a millionaire, and having houses all over, right? I can just pick from whichever I choose?"

Of course, being trapped in a floating virtual castle was far, far from being unbelievably wealthy. One was impossibly good fortune, while the other was... well, her reality. She opened her mouth to say as much, when the boy's introduction caught her attention. The wobbly smile that had taken up residence on her flushed cheeks bloomed into something more genuine, and there was some real power behind the handshake when her hand met his. ""Bismarck," she echoed. "Is that like the German battleship?" Sensing the confusion before it even came, she hastily added, "I was going to school to be a history teacher. I have a lot of obscure knowledge bouncing around up here." With her free hand, she tapped her temple gently.

[Bismarck 0]

'Like being a millionaire.' Lessa's casual metaphor carried far more weight for him than she'd probably intended. Just *having* houses on different parts of the castle, no doubt the product of both time and work. It was like he'd expected, the girl had been using her time far more effectively. What a harshly clear representation of what he'd been failing to even pursue. He broke eye contact just before the handshake, glancing off to the side. At the clouds. Nothing like a tangible representation of success to really put his dull life in perspective.

However Lessa's words tugged him out of his thoughts mid handshake. His grip had been decent enough, but it seemed fairly milquetoast. A far cry from the eye contact and semi-confident smile he'd approached with. The girl's acknowledgement of his name brought those piercing blue eyes of his right back, a look of mild surprise interrupting his mask of a smile. When that positive look returned, it was smaller, but this time he didn't have to fake it. "Uh-... Yeah. Or the chancellor, if you wanna look at it that way." Bismarck replied, tightening his grip slightly right at the tail end of their introductory shake. "What sort of history d'you wanna teach? Any era or place in specific?" Finally distracted from his own thoughts, he shifted into asking the first question that hit his mind, accidentally phrasing it as if they weren't trapped in a death game. As if they were just having a normal conversation in the real world.

@Lessa

[Lessa 1]

They were entering more comfortable territory, like lost wanderers finding their way back to a marked trail. Lessa could breathe a little easier now, and even begin to enjoy herself as the conversation turned toward history. "When I finish up my degree," she answered, "I'll be certified to teach anything social studies related, grades six through twelve. That's history, but also government, economics, geography, that sort of thing." She stopped herself suddenly, as if the realization of what she'd said was a brick wall. "If," she amended, quietly. "If I finish my degree."

The pair was plunged into uncomfortable silence as Lessa reached down to play with the hem of her hooded sweatshirt. Then she loosed a sigh. "You'd think I'd get better at this after all these years," she muttered, as much to herself as to Bismarck. "I still have a hard time focusing on the outside world. If I believe, with all my heart, that we'll make it out, maybe I'm being naive. But if admit to myself that maybe it won't happen, I'm a pathetic pessimist." The half-hearted laugh she gave was bereft of all humor, and when her gaze met his, hurt lurked within her blue eyes. She blinked it back rapidly.

"Anyway," she continued, "I'm pretty fascinated by all kinds of history. I focused on World War II, and the Holocaust, for my senior thesis. I was teaching the Western Hemisphere to sixth graders for my internship when..." She motioned to their surroundings, "this all happened."

[Bismarck 0]

It surprised him to hear such doubts coming from a more experienced player. Perhaps it shouldn't have, Bismarck was no stranger the existential worries that many players expressed about their imprisonment. Even he had been assailed by such grim fancies from time to time. An uncharacteristic pessimism lurking in the wake of his stagnating melancholy. Still it caught him off guard to hear the words from Lessa, cutting in to interrupt their pleasant conversation. It was something he'd never expected to hear from a higher leveled player. Maybe this girl wasn't the type of person he'd pegged her as, or maybe the vulnerability she'd just shown him was a bit more common than he'd like to imagine. Certainly it made this soldier of Aincrad a little easier to relate to. Loathe though he was to admit that he could sympathize with her conflicted words.

Before SAO, before all that time he'd wasted away, Bismarck would've had a response to Lessa's uncertainty. Dismissing her doubts out of hand on the grounds of their futility. He still knew what those words would be, but now he hesitated to give it. Instead he just watched, his smile mostly fading, as she shook off the dark topic and returned to answering his question. "Where're you getting your degree at?" Ordinarily he might've stayed with the topic of history. It was fun to talk about, after all. Especially where the early twentieth century was concerned. Bismarck, as evidenced by his name, found a certain allure in the horrors of the two Great Wars. However this time he decided to go down a different avenue, unable to shake the dreary subject that had invaded their conversation mere moments earlier. So once she was done speaking, he asked another question about Lessa's life.

This time the present tense was intentional.

@Lessa

[Lessa 1]

There was gratitude in the small smile she offered him. It would have been easy to throw a pity party, or slip back into the pessimism and darkness, but he did neither. Instead, he continued to discuss her educational journey - in the present tense. Though he was a complete stranger, and she knew very little about him, she could admire that small bit of kindness.

"Michigan State," she answered easily, though the thought of it caused a lump in her throat. She paused to swallow around it, and then continued. "Same school that generations of my family members, on both sides, went to. I'll be the first teacher though, which is kind of cool."

At her side, the wolf gave a massive yawn, accompanied by a high-pitched whine. Once more, she was reminded of an annoyed toddler with difficulties waiting patiently. Absentmindedly, Lessa reached a hand down to pat the canine's head. "Anyway," she concluded, "enough about me." It was here that players had to tread carefully. They were, after all, still in a virtual world. Not everyone wished to discuss their real lives. This seemed to be even more true as the years passed, when players grew even more detached from the lives they once lived. Many find comfort in forgetting, experiencing pain at the thought of what was lost. For Lessa, it was just an odd sort of numbness.

"It's neat that you're interested in history. Are you studying it?"

@Bismarck

[Bismarck 0]

"I guess you could say that." Bismarck surprised himself with the ease of his own words. He didn't often like to think about his past. Not because of the life he'd lost, but because of how he'd changed. Pleasant in nature though his many memories were, they all came with the same harrowing reminder. That he might no longer be the enthusiastic boy who lived them. So he was surprised with how easily the reply came to him, a sincerely friendly expression returning to his face. As though it had never faded. "I'm not looking to teach it or anything, but it's fun to learn about." He continued, the smile showing in his voice now as well.

Perhaps it was the normalcy they'd managed to inject into their words. When they talked about their past lives in the present tense, it cut out the grim middleman of their lives in The Game. Of his life in The Game. "I'm mostly just interested in the wars, but history in general is always pretty cool." There was a legitimate cheer to his words now, even if it was still a tad subdued. "Most recently I'd started hearing a lot more about The Great War. Stuff I'd never heard about in class before, like The Christmas Truce. I would've looked up more, but-..." Bismarck trailed off, glancing off in the direction of Floor 1's artificial sky. "Well, y'know." This time the acknowledgement of their virtual prison didn't delve into the despair it had held mere seconds earlier. Instead it was more of an offhanded snark at the castle's creator, carrying a tone that was more annoyed than helpless.

"It's weird to think how almost everything that's happened in the last century can be traced back to a single war." Without skipping a beat he just let his train of thought keep running, his piercing blue gaze returning to Lessa as he spoke. "That's probably one of the main reasons I like studying it nowadays. It and the whole 20th century that came after."

@Lessa

[Lessa 1]

A light blush bloomed across Lessa's face, warming despite the air's slight cool. As the color rose, she took a brief moment to recognize how odd the sensation was. Was she embarrassed? When had she last felt that way?

"Well," she began slowly, gaze dropping to study Riker. The massive canine leaned against her leg, relishing in the sensation of her long fingers scratching behind his ear. "I can't claim to know everything, especially when it comes to World War I. But I'm a stockpile of useless knowledge, and maybe I know a few things you haven't learned yet." When she glanced up again, it was with a small, shy smile. "I'm always up for talking about history, and maybe we could both teach each other." Then, "If you're interested, I mean."

Returning to his earlier statement, she turned to gaze out over the slowly shifting virtual sky. The colors were alluring, and she was easily lulled into watching them for extended periods of time. As such, as she plunged into her own thoughts, a moment of silence fell between them. It broke only when she said, "I do like studying that sort of thing. The cause and effect. It's neat, when you consider how big of an impact one person, or one event can have. That ripple effect can be sort of reassuring, when you're feeling really insignificant."

@Bismarck