Jinx 0 Posted December 18, 2019 Author #21 Share Posted December 18, 2019 Part of Alisea wanted to simply curl up into a ball and let reality fade into an abstract concept, to let life pass her by and be a spectator in her own life. It was what she was best at after all, and yet, despite that pulse to let everything fade away...Here she was, listening to Stryder talk. It was always the same, the same talk peopel gave her...About how her real life was worth it and her parents loved her. No one truly listened to her screams of pain, of loniness...of suffering, even if those screams were so quite, sometimes she was deaf to them. She tuned Stryders voice in, to hear something different. That despite it all, despite everything, he wanted to hepl...Wanted to see her beyond the confines of the game. She was silent for many, many moments while her mind flared to life. "Despite being in a game of death and pain, you...want to see me? I won't, remind you of her...?" She couldn't even look at Stryder as she said the next part, hating herself as she did what her active mind demand: A clear answer. "Won't looking after me, remind me of your friend...Of Eatos?" Jinx, the part of the girl with a heart, hated how her active mind demanded a simple answer: Was she the dead girls replacement? Did Stryder only care about her, becuase of the friend he'd failed to save all that time ago? Was she simply his guilty conscous manifest? She hated the idea of it, and.....the answer terrified her. Link to post Share on other sites
Stryder 0 Posted December 20, 2019 #22 Share Posted December 20, 2019 R....Remind him of her? What... That, that was a weird one... Though, now that she said it, it did spark his mind into it. Did... was he using her as a replacement? Was she just here to replace the one he had lost? Was he just... looking after her because he failed to look after Katherine? His mind was shaking, panic slowly rising, but then he looked at her, before warmly smiling. No... That wasn't it... She wasn't here just to replace her... Though she did seem to help him like she did... That wasn't the reason though, that wasn't why... "R..Remind me of Eatos.... No.... Looking after you doesn't remind me of her.... You are a lot like her though, your kind, amazing and smart. But that's not why i want to look after you... I'm not taking care of you to replace someone i lost..." He said with a reassuring smile to her. It was all true. "Alisea.... I want to look after you so that I can learn more about you... So that i can keep you safe... I want to look after you so I can get you home to the real world, and then, if i survive myself, possibly meet you all over again, someone who I actually can trust" He said, now pulling her into him should she let him. He didn't want to lose anyone else, but that wasn't... No, that wasn't why he was so fond of her.... The only way she reminded him of Katherine, is the fact he doesn't want to lose anyone else... Link to post Share on other sites
Jinx 0 Posted December 23, 2019 Author #23 Share Posted December 23, 2019 It had always been a worry in her heart, something deep and brooding within her that she never wanted to admit it. Whenever her mind became active, it was the worry. Did her friend see her as nothing more than the reincarnation of the person he failed to protect, was she nothing more than his redemption for his failures. She felt closed off, like the world....She shook her head. It didn't matter, it was his decision to reveal the truth. She ran her hand over her fingers, tracing them with her nails slightly as a way to calm herself. To prevent herself from freaking out as she listened to her friend speak. It felt as if there was a train coming right at her, as he spoke more and more. "So...I'm not her..." She said softly. It was so selfish in a way, he simply wanted to learn about her and take care of her. And...all of it out of kindness, not guilt. And like that, it faded away. The worry, the train. It vanished like smoke. "When my mind was active...It, i, worried. that i was nothing more than a replacement. I was the person who, you picked up. As a way to redeem yourself for your friend killing herself. To hear that i'm not...I'm happy, to hear" The girl leaned into him, allowing him to wrap his arm around her shoulder. Link to post Share on other sites
Stryder 0 Posted December 25, 2019 #24 Share Posted December 25, 2019 So, she had been worried... She let him wrap his arm around her and pull her close, saying how she was worried that she was just a replacement for her. That, she was just someone he had picked up to redeem himself... He couldn't even believe for a moment that she has thought that the whole time... Though, the thought had crossed his mind. Was that the only reason he enjoyed looking after her? Was he just trying to redeem himself? But... No, he had realized it wasn't true. Sure, part of her reminded him of her, and it was quite comforting, but, that wasn't the reason he lov- Ummm... did i really just think that "Your not a replacement to her, in any way..... I was close to Katherine, but -" He says to her, pulling her closer with his arm wrapped around him, and softly poking her cheek in a kind manner "She never lived with me, she never laid into me, stole my room" He says before putting his head on hers for a moment. "You are yourself, your in no way a replacement for her.... I'm not trying to redeem myself by looking after you... At least, not you alone" He says, now removing his head from hers, and, if possible, looking at her eyes. "The way..... i want to honour and redeem myself.... Is to keep everyone in the guild safe, and get everyone here home safe...." He says, smiling to her more. "But..... For now, i'm happy being here with you" Link to post Share on other sites
Jinx 0 Posted January 3, 2020 Author #25 Share Posted January 3, 2020 The guild, all of it, in a way, was redemption for the girls death. And yet, it wasn't. The boy hadn't come to her thinknig she was his dead friend, a worry that had been snapping its ugly head at her for a while now. It was alarming, at the time at least. But now, knowing the 'truth'. Jinx let out a sigh and even cuddled up closer to Stryder. "I'm sorry...It's horrible of me to assume, that i was nothing more than your dead friend. But i couldn't...couldn't stop myself from..." The girl let out a weak sigh, and looked stryder right in the eyes. Her mind blazing with activity. "It was so wrong of me, that horrible part of me that assumes the worst in everyone yet, i couldn't shake it..." The girl let out another loud sigh, flintching slightly as her mind began to result in a headache "But, i had to...had to know...the truth about it all. But now i do, i'm so glad...I ignored what my brain was saying...And followed my...my..." The girl closed her eyes and forced her mind to stwitch off. The overloads.... Jinxs' body fully relaxed, leaning into Stryder completely and even her head dropped down "I'm just happy...that i found someone, who cares" she muttered, in German as her mind was unable to stick to a single language again "someone who knows what, what i...like" Link to post Share on other sites
Stryder 0 Posted January 3, 2020 #26 Share Posted January 3, 2020 He felt really warm, his chest felt nice and warm, as she cuddled up to him more, basically treating him like a soft mattress, he didn't mind, he actually liked it. He listened to her, intent on hearing every word... The poor girl really had been worried for awhile, hadn't she? That he was just using her to replace someone he had lost... He felt really bad about that. If she felt that, he must have unconciously been doing something to make her feel that way. He didn't know what... Maybe.... He had no idea what it was that made her think that, but, it was obvious something he had done. Whatever it was.... He had to stop it. "Its fine Alisea, i forgive you... You were worried about something, its fine. Everyone has that part of them that assumes the worst in everyone.... But you manage to find the best in most of us" He says, letting her lean into him as much as she wanted after she put her head down onto his chest after looking him in the eyes. He was glad himself, that he told her the truth... It made him feel better, letting out his emotions. He had been scared, he would get.... Hurt, just like when he had before... A lot had gone wrong for him, Pinball had turned player killer, he had attacked Hestia publically... Made enemies out of her, and a lot of people who had been there in that town. He had lost Katherine.... But, this moment. This was right, nothing was wrong with that. Then, she spoke in german. He couldn't help but silently laugh, he never used the auto translate feature, because it was boring most of the time. But when she talks he sometimes misses it. When she sunk into him completely, he put a hand on her head, and softly stroked her hair, playing with it gently. "I really do care about you.... More than anything" He says silently to himself mostly... He hoped that this wouldn't end. When they got to the real world... He didn't want this to end. Link to post Share on other sites
Jinx 0 Posted January 3, 2020 Author #27 Share Posted January 3, 2020 Jinx shifted in his arms, her head making a constant pounding as her overload had threatened to take her out entirely. Thankfully, she kept her head steady and focused on the conversation. mostly. The dull sensation overrun the girl, hence why she had gone nearly limp into her guild-leader and friends arms. She took many deep breaths and tried to bring her mind alive, but it faltered and tripped over itself. Slowly, the girl managed to find her feet and pull herself up. She turned around, nearly tripping in the process before smiling softly at Stryder, a shine in her eyes "I..thank you...Need, nap..." The girls failed attempt at a sentence made perfect sense to her, and even bowed to Stryder slightly. In her mind, she'd thanked him for everything including staying at his house again, thanked him for it in the bow, then would head to her room for sleep. The girl moved up the stairs, ensuring she didn't trip over before turning into her room, forgetting to close the door (again), and collapsing on the bed with a soft 'thump' noise she always made when she was tired, or overloaded. She was asleep the moment her head hit the pillow. Link to post Share on other sites
Stryder 0 Posted January 6, 2020 #28 Share Posted January 6, 2020 She basically fell asleep... On him. He didn't move, he didn't compain, he just let her lay there in his arms for the time she choose to. It was fine, it made him glad she was comfy, it only made her more adorable. She was light too, though that might just be his strength level, which, given he was a martial artist, was quite high. Otherwise he would be quite weak... But that wasn't a thought he was going to say outloud, he had no idea her weight, and he knew, if only one thing about most girls and women, they could be touchy about weight. After awhile, she woke up it seemed, and got up. He helped her, making sure she didn't fall, and when she almost tripped he went to catch her, luckily she didn't fall though. She was tired... She had stayed awake waiting for him afterall. "Goodnight Alisea" He said, staying for a few minutes, before heading off towards his room. On the way, he saw her door open, smiling he pulled it closed, sealing her room off from the outside world so she could sleep without sound bothering her, then went to the kitchen, making a quick snack before going to bed. His familiar followed him, curling up on his bed, which he had back now. "You know silver... Something is really special about her, and its not just that you like her" He grins to his familiar, playing with her fur a little before they went to sleep. --- BOTH 1 SP 200 Col Link to post Share on other sites
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