[SP-F07] A job's a job <<2nd Arabian Night>>

[Freyd 0]

Blade and club clashed repeatedly as each combatant sought to overpower or outmaneuver the other.  The mob's size hindered his agility and speed, leaving him exposed.  Despite the size of his weapon, Freyd handled it with the speed and finesse of a much smaller and lighter weapon.  A slam to the side of the head momentarily staggered the larger man and was followed by a vicious slash across the chest.  The telltale thin orange line of sheared mesh joined the other previously delivered injuries, dwindling his health bar firmly into the yellow range.  

"Where are the goods?"  Freyd didn't expect an honest answer.  It was a trick, meant to get his enemy to betray himself.  Eyes glances up to the house on the beach, just beyond their battleground. 

"Thanks."

Jaw fallen, realization of his revelation dawned over the musclehead thick and heavy brow.  He'd just betrayed his boss.  That carried consequences.  His only remaining hope was to put Freyd in the ground, though that seemed increasingly unlikely to happen.

Spoiler

Freyd regains 92 HP from BH.

Galaxy Destroyer (x13): 13 EN - (Finesse 3, Turn Recovery) = 9 EN

ID #180727 | BD: 4+6-1=9 (hit).   Freyd deals (12*26=312-44=268) damage to Beach Bandit Elite #2.

ID #180727 | MD: 8-4+1=5 (miss).  Beach Bandit Elite #2 misses Freyd.

Freyd, The Whisper in Shadows | HP:1685/1845 | EN:71/183 | DMG:26 | MIT:79 | EVA:4 | ACC:6 | VAMP OFF:184 | HLY:6 | FLN:6 | TOX.VEN 24 | LD:8 | PROSP 3 | BH:92

Beach Bandit Elite #2: HP: 432/1100 | DMG 330 | MIT: 44 | ACC: 1 | EVA: 1 (700-268)

 

[Freyd 0]

"I'll be sure to let the big boss know that you told me where to find him."  Freyd's taunt had the desired effect, as the bigger man charged him clumsily, exposing his flank as he wound up to try and knock him with his best drive.  Samael's Pride caught him in the ribs, drinking deep as it pulsed with the momentary hunger of the void, slashing deep beneath his right arm.  As his arm came down reactively to protect his side, the thug's attack went wide and was easily dodge with a roll that placed Freyd behind him and ready for another strike.

"Aren't there supposed to be, like, forty of you, or something?  How's that going to be useful or effective when you're scattered all over half of Aincrad?"  Stepping to his left and ducking low, Freyd dodged another wild swipe.  "Honestly, I think I've killed half your gang already, and I'm still waiting to be impressed."

Spoiler

Freyd regains 92 HP from BH.

Galaxy Destroyer (x13): 13 EN - (Finesse 3, Turn Recovery) = 9 EN

ID #180728 | BD: 8+6-1=13 (hit, Fallen +6).   Freyd deals (12*32=384-44=340) damage to Beach Bandit Elite #2.

ID #180728 | MD: 8-4+1=5 (miss).  Beach Bandit Elite #2 misses Freyd.

Freyd, The Whisper in Shadows | HP:1777/1845 | EN:62/183 | DMG:26 | MIT:79 | EVA:4 | ACC:6 | VAMP OFF:184 | HLY:6 | FLN:6 | TOX.VEN 24 | LD:8 | PROSP 3 | BH:92

Beach Bandit Elite #2: HP: 92/1100 | DMG 330 | MIT: 44 | ACC: 1 | EVA: 1 (432-340)

 

[Freyd 0]

That got him really mad.  Freyd found it slightly funny, how mobs could project attachment to a gang or group which existed in name only.  They'd all respawn and resume their former roles over and over again.  Killing the forty thieves forty times would achieve nothing more that a heaping pile of loot.  Freyd was okay with that.  Loot meant resources and raw materials for a merchant.  It was part of the reason that he'd accepted Ali's promised prize in the first place.  Coin was handy, but it was the items that he sought and desired.  It felt like that strange, anxious joy he felt just before opening a booster pack for some trading card game, every time that he started to examine of them.  What secrets would it hold?  Was it just junk or the next world-shattering weapon?  Each item held a reserve of potential to be tapped and coaxed into manifesting in his hands. 

As his daydream ended, Freyd realized that his opponent was down.  He'd slain him without even paying attention.

Sloppy.

Spoiler

Freyd regains 92 HP from BH.

Galaxy Destroyer (x13): 13 EN - (Finesse 3, Turn Recovery) = 9 EN

ID #180729 | BD: 4+6-1=9 (hit).   Freyd deals (12*26=312-44=268) damage to Beach Bandit Elite #2.

Freyd, The Whisper in Shadows | HP:1845/1845 | EN:53/183 | DMG:26 | MIT:79 | EVA:4 | ACC:6 | VAMP OFF:184 | HLY:6 | FLN:6 | TOX.VEN 24 | LD:8 | PROSP 3 | BH:92

Beach Bandit Elite #2: HP: 0/1100 | DMG 330 | MIT: 44 | ACC: 1 | EVA: 1 (92-268)

Loot Rolls

ID #180781 (LD: 4+8=12 | CD: 4) - Beach Bandit Elite #2

11550*Col
T3 Rare Trinket #180781a
 

[Freyd 0]

Gathering his wits, Freyd chastised himself for the distraction.  Loss of concentration in the middle of a fight could prove fatal.  Restoring his focus, he renewed his assessment of his surroundings.  A heavy wood door barred entry to the boss' beach house, reinforced with thick, black iron banding.  Not exactly your average, welcoming resort villa, was it?  The gang must have muscled in to this area some time ago and taken whatever they wanted.  Floor 22's NPCs weren't particularly tough or strong willed.  This level always felt more like some sort of retirement home, compared to the others that had been explored to date.  More than few players had settled here in hopes of just waiting out their fate as Kayaba's pawns, content to let others jump through his hoops.

Or maybe they've just given up?

A fair point.  He had been one of those people, not so long ago.  Now he looked down upon their isolation.  The hypocrisy stung, but not because of how he viewed them now.  It shamed him to have ever been one of them.

Rest 1/2

[Freyd 0]

This quest line has more quests, does it not?

"What's your point, Montjoy?"

Doesn't it seem odd that you're about to face, and presumably kill the head thief?

"Huh.  Yeah.  I suppose.  Maybe the map I used unlocked a bonus area, or something.  Honestly, if it grants loot, I'm not overly concerned about it."  His shadow remained silent in response, implying agreement - at least, so far as Freyd was concerned.  Around them, the rest of the resort seemed abandoned.  Dozens of pristine, beautifully crafted lawn chairs sat, sunning themselves in the absence of occupants.  Large, round umbrellas provided shade for no one and little crab-like critters wandered wantonly about the place.  the entire area felt... odd.

"So, which moron filled your head with the notion that you could come and steal my rightfully stolen stuff?"

The villa door stood ajar.  Before Freyd stood Ali's nemesis, and he was not at all what he'd expected.  Barely five feet tall, with a tan so dark that he could make molasses jealous, the boss was a scrawny little thing.  He wore a white bucket hat and sunglasses similar to one worn by his captain.  Two thumb-sized bands of cream stained his irritated angular cheeks from having sat in the sun too long.  Undyed, knee-length cotton pants, so wrinkled that they bunched no matter how he stood, complimented a red, short-sleeve shirt with patterned white palm trees all over it.  Clearly, the boss was the brains behind this outfit, and not the brawn.

Freyd fumed.

"Where the hell did you get my vacation clothes?!"

Rest 2/2

[Freyd 0]

"Wait.  What?  Who are... Aaaah!"

Freyd rushed the guy, knowing better than to judge a mob by its appearance.  Blazing white with holy wrath, his weapon clearly approved.  Moments later, it smashed into the rail-thin ringleader and sent him cascading, head over heels across the scalding sands.  Fortunately for the mob, his face broke his fall, leaving a 20-foot rut behind him and overwhelming urge to sneeze and clear the grit out his nostrils.  Rising back to his feet, the boss tilted his neck to the left, producing an unnaturally intimidating cracking of bone type of noise.  Grabbing a pair of children's sand shovels that looked sun-bleached and long abandoned, he settled into a perfect stance that instantly confirmed Freyd's suspicions.  This man was no slouch.

"It's like that, is it?"

A rueful, shit-eating grin spread across his opponent's face.  This was a mastermind, accomplished and accustomed to having his way.  The same was expected here.  Freyd looked forward to disappointing him.

Spoiler

Freyd uses masterwork [instant] 2-slot Hypnosis (-2 ACC) on Beach Bandit Boss [170496]

Galaxy Destroyer (x13): 13 EN - (Rested 1st of 2, Finesse 3) = 9 EN

ID #180730 | BD: 10 (Crit +2, Holy +6).   Freyd deals (12*34=408-110=298) damage to Beach Bandit Boss.

ID #180730 | MD: 6-4+0=2 (miss)

Freyd, The Whisper in Shadows | HP:1845/1845 | EN:174/183 | DMG:26 | MIT:79 | EVA:4 | ACC:6 | VAMP OFF:184 | HLY:6 | FLN:6 | TOX.VEN 24 | LD:8 | PROSP 3 | BH:92

Beach Bandit Boss: HP: 1352/1650 | DMG 440 | MIT: 110 | ACC: 2 (0) | EVA: 2 (1650-298)
•    Critical (MD 9): Deals (484) DMG to the target with the highest hate. Also deals (242) DMG to every other player.
•    Critical (MD 10): Deals (528) DMG to the target with the highest hate. Also deals (264) DMG to every other player.
 

 

[Freyd 0]

Facing off, mano-a-mano, Freyd couldn't help but think that he was overdressed for the standoff, while his opponent looked like a complete dork.  It was going to be one of those fights.  A spray of sand kicked up by the master thief's sudden sweep spray the area where Freyd stood, each grain cascading back to rejoin its brethren and ultimately revealing one of the universe's great, unspeakable truths: Freyd was no longer there.  The same cloud that was intended to blind the boss' approach provided cover in reverse and gave him the opportunity he needed.  Rolling right and following with a heavy upward swing, the black blade clipped Mr.Scrawny in the legs, as confirmed by a very unimpressive yelp.

"Seriously, dude," Freyd said, " are you actually this bad at this?  How the hell did you manage to end up in charge?"  The Whisper wheeled and spun, delivering a roundhouse kick that connected and sent his foe flying, but inflicting only marginal damage without a sword art's power to back it up.

Spoiler

Freyd uses masterwork [instant] 2-slot Lullaby (-2 EVA) on Beach Bandit Boss [170110]

Freyd activates Charge.

Galaxy Destroyer (x13): 13 EN - (Rested 2nd of 2, Finesse 3, Turn Recovery) = 8 EN

ID #180733 | BD: 5+6-1-0=10 (hit, Charge +5).   Freyd deals (12*31=372-110=262) damage to Beach Bandit Boss.

ID #180733 | MD: 6-4+0=2 (miss)

Freyd, The Whisper in Shadows | HP:1845/1845 | EN:166/183 | DMG:26 | MIT:79 | EVA:4 | ACC:6 | VAMP OFF:184 | HLY:6 | FLN:6 | TOX.VEN 24 | LD:8 | PROSP 3 | BH:92

Beach Bandit Boss: HP: 1090/1650 | DMG 440 | MIT: 110 | ACC: 2 (0) | EVA: 2 (0) (1352-262)
•    Critical (MD 9): Deals (484) DMG to the target with the highest hate. Also deals (242) DMG to every other player.
•    Critical (MD 10): Deals (528) DMG to the target with the highest hate. Also deals (264) DMG to every other player.

 

[Freyd 0]

"You have NO idea who you're messing with!  I'll use your hide as a parka!"

Sword met shovels in a dazzling display of martial skill whose impressiveness was considerably countered by its absurdity.  Honestly, who uses kids shovels?!  They must have been part of the mob's kit by default, or his sword would have cut them to pieces on the first strike.  Somehow, the cheap, faded plastic held as they traded blows in rapid succession.  Freyd gave ground, deliberately, stepping carefully over the dip he'd spotted in the sands, and without looking down.  Nearing the point of frenzy, Mr.Scrawny failed to watch his surroundings and fell forward and he stepped into the subtle void.  

"Really?  A winter reference during a scorching hot summer beach fight?  Couldn't you have gone with volleyball, or something?"  Another swift strike to the shoulder as during the stumble sealed the effectiveness of the taunt.  Scrawny's eyes were bloodshot and watering, as he recovered. 

This boss doesn't liked to be talked down to.

Excellent.

Spoiler

Galaxy Destroyer (x13): 13 EN - (Finesse 3, Turn Recovery) = 9 EN

ID #180734 | BD: 3+6-0=9 (hit).   Freyd deals (12*26=312-110=202) damage to Beach Bandit Boss.

ID #180734 | MD: 6-4+0=2 (miss)

Freyd, The Whisper in Shadows | HP:1845/1845 | EN:157/183 | DMG:26 | MIT:79 | EVA:4 | ACC:6 | VAMP OFF:184 | HLY:6 | FLN:6 | TOX.VEN 24 | LD:8 | PROSP 3 | BH:92

Beach Bandit Boss: HP: 888/1650 | DMG 440 | MIT: 110 | ACC: 2 (0) | EVA: 2 (0) (1090-202)
•    Critical (MD 9): Deals (484) DMG to the target with the highest hate. Also deals (242) DMG to every other player.
•    Critical (MD 10): Deals (528) DMG to the target with the highest hate. Also deals (264) DMG to every other player.

 

[Freyd 0]

Something snapped; possibly a femur, but more likely some limit break condition in the mob's psychological module.  Scrawny lost it, and not in any impressive manner.  Frothing at the mouth, he launched himself at Freyd with furious abandon.  The shovels were gone.  It was nothing but barely balled fists, cattish clawing and attempted bitch slaps backed by the power of a limp noodle.  Freyd might have felt sorry for the man, if he were capable of such a thing.  As pathetic as the display was, he had no illusions that the mob was any less dangerous or potentially lethal, if it managed to connect.  For the moment, he chipped away at its health by parrying and deflecting the madman's flailing, cutting up his fists and arms in the process.  The imagery was for show, but the numbers mattered.  

Further taunting seemed pointless.  The man had already become unhinged and might even have been made more dangerous in the process, but it served its purpose.  Freyd kited him around the beach in slow, patterned movements meant to keep him in a steadily shifting kill zone, whittling him down towards zero.

Spoiler

Galaxy Destroyer (x13): 13 EN - (Finesse 3, Turn Recovery) = 9 EN

ID #180735 | BD: 7+6-0=13 (hit, Fallen +6).   Freyd deals (12*32=384-110=274) damage to Beach Bandit Boss.

ID #180735 | MD: 1 (miss)

Freyd, The Whisper in Shadows | HP:1845/1845 | EN:148/183 | DMG:26 | MIT:79 | EVA:4 | ACC:6 | VAMP OFF:184 | HLY:6 | FLN:6 | TOX.VEN 24 | LD:8 | PROSP 3 | BH:92

Beach Bandit Boss: HP: 614/1650 | DMG 440 | MIT: 110 | ACC: 2 (0) | EVA: 2 (0) (888-274)
•    Critical (MD 9): Deals (484) DMG to the target with the highest hate. Also deals (242) DMG to every other player.
•    Critical (MD 10): Deals (528) DMG to the target with the highest hate. Also deals (264) DMG to every other player.

 

[Freyd 0]

Another stumble followed with overextension gave him the opening he sought.  Charging the black blade with holy wrath, Freyd unleashed it on his vulnerable foe, swatting him back towards the house with such force that he punctured the near and far walls.  Billowing dust followed a loud and awkward crack and crunch that saw two palm trees on the building's far side shudder and fall in separate directions, followed almost immediately by the clattering of stone and multiple splashes.

Clearing the rubble of the man's former villa, Freyd found Scrawny trying to extricate himself from the ruins of a hot spring tub in the middle of his former patio.  Most of the stonework had been torn up as the mob had crashed like a meteor into the water-filled pool.  An assortment of pool furniture and improvised water toys lay strewn about in a suitably post-apocalyptic manner.

Not bad.

'I think I sliced it a bit,' Freyd replied rotating his left shoulder, as if to loosen virtual muscles.

Spoiler

Galaxy Destroyer (x13): 13 EN - (Finesse 3, Turn Recovery) = 9 EN

ID #180736 | BD: 10 (Crit +2, Holy +6).   Freyd deals (12*34=442-110=332) damage to Beach Bandit Boss.  Tox.Ven applied.

ID #180736 | MD: 6-4+0=2 (miss)

Freyd, The Whisper in Shadows | HP:1845/1845 | EN:139/183 | DMG:26 | MIT:79 | EVA:4 | ACC:6 | VAMP OFF:184 | HLY:6 | FLN:6 | TOX.VEN 24 | LD:8 | PROSP 3 | BH:92

Beach Bandit Boss: HP: 258/1650 | DMG 440 | MIT: 110 | ACC: 2 (0) | EVA: 2 (0) | Tox.Ven. 24 (1st of 2) (614-332-24)
•    Critical (MD 9): Deals (484) DMG to the target with the highest hate. Also deals (242) DMG to every other player.
•    Critical (MD 10): Deals (528) DMG to the target with the highest hate. Also deals (264) DMG to every other player.

 

[Freyd 0]

"Did you really...*cough*... think that it would be this easy?"  Scrawny really wasn't looking so good.  His face wall all swollen and several joints were bent back to degrees that looked like they would require significantly more than a bandage and kiss on the forehead to heal.

"Well, to be perfectly honest," Freyd said, clearing the remains of the man's perforated home, "I was kinda hoping: yes?"

Scrawny snapped his finger, as if triggering some sort of phase shift.  All around them, the pool and beach furniture rattled as it started to coming to life.  The clatter of varnished wooden legs combined with the squeals of inadequately oiled hinges to signal the impending arrival of a new threat.

"Aww crap."  Freyd's sword speared the mob through the chest, shattering him into fractal motes that sizzled like bath balm as they fell into the still-steaming waters of the spring.  His hopes that slaying the man in charge might subdue his minions were soon dashed, as a swarm of angry furniture instantly fell upon him.

Spoiler

Galaxy Destroyer (x13): 13 EN - (Finesse 3, Turn Recovery) = 9 EN

ID #180737 | BD: 8+6-0=14 (Hit, Fallen +6).   Freyd deals (12*32=384-110=274) damage to Beach Bandit Boss.  Tox.Ven applied.

Freyd, The Whisper in Shadows | HP:1845/1845 | EN:130/183 | DMG:26 | MIT:79 | EVA:4 | ACC:6 | VAMP OFF:184 | HLY:6 | FLN:6 | TOX.VEN 24 | LD:8 | PROSP 3 | BH:92

Beach Bandit Boss: HP: 0/1650 | DMG 440 | MIT: 110 | ACC: 2 (0) | EVA: 2 (0) | Tox.Ven. 24 (2nd of 2) (258-274-24)
•    Critical (MD 9): Deals (484) DMG to the target with the highest hate. Also deals (242) DMG to every other player.
•    Critical (MD 10): Deals (528) DMG to the target with the highest hate. Also deals (264) DMG to every other player.

Loot Rolls

ID #180782 (LD: 9+8=17 | CD: 4) - Beach Bandit Boss

13860*Col
2*T3 Materials
T3 Rare Consumable #180782a
T3 Rare Weapon #180782b
 

[Freyd 0]

As a wave of clattering lawn chairs swarmed all over him, Freyd could hardly believe his eyes.

"Seriously?!"

The bite of a folding chair snapping its joints shut onto his hand quickly confirmed the reality of the threat, especially as more wooden menaces could already be seen shambling awkwardly in his direction.  Little differentiated them from the mobs that he had just fought.  They were merely a modified form of code designed with the same sinister intent: to end the existence of players.  

"Who the hell designed was allowed to design lawn chair terminators?"

A sword out boomed as blasts of light and dark broke the ranks of encroaching chattel and scattered them.  Splinters flew all about and individual members and components broke, but Freyd's insect-like assailants were not easily dissuaded.  They pressed forward, again and again, forcing him to adopt a more mobile defense made more difficult by the surging tide of reinforcements close behind.

Spoiler

Freyd activates Charge

Calamity Disaster (x12 AoE +8 for hits): 20 EN - (Rested 1st of 2, Finesse 3) = 16 EN.

ID #180739 | BD: 8+6-1=13 (hit, Charge +5, Fallen +6).  Freyd deals (12*37=444) damage to Animated Chair #1.
ID #180740 | BD: 3+6-1=8 (hit, Charge +5).  Freyd deals (12*32=384) damage to Animated Chair #2.
ID #180741 | BD: 7+6-1=12 (hit, Charge +5, Fallen +6).  Freyd deals (12*37=444) damage to Animated Chair #3.
ID #180743 | BD: 10 (Crit +2, Charge +5, Fallen +6).  Freyd deals (12*39=468) damage to Animated Chair #4.

ID #180739 | MD: 8-4=4 (miss)
ID #180740 | MD: 3-4=(-1) (miss)
ID #180741 | MD: 6-4=2 (miss)
ID #180743 | MD: 9 (Crit +1).  Animated Chair #4 deals (253-79=174) damage to Freyd.

Freyd, The Whisper in Shadows | HP:1671/1845 | EN:114/183 | DMG:26 | MIT:79 | EVA:4 | ACC:6 | VAMP OFF:184 | HLY:6 | FLN:6 | TOX.VEN 24 | LD:8 | PROSP 3 | BH:92

Animated Chair #1 | HP 228/672 | DMG 252 (672-444)
Animated Chair #2 | HP 288/672 | DMG 252 (672-384)
Animated Chair #3 | HP 228/672 | DMG 252 (672-444)
Animated Chair #4 | HP 204/672 | DMG 252 (672-468)

 

[Freyd 0]

Luring the batch closest to him into Scrawny's partially demolished home, Freyd unleashed a horizontal slice of light that sheered its walls and brought down the remaining structure.  It crushed most of the advancing chair-bug-thingies as it fell, but one leapt clear and crashed down onto him, momentarily pinning him to the sandy ground.  Though not particularly heavy, the damned thing was agile enough to jab one of its sharpened legs deep into his shoulder before he could throw it off.  Despite their flimsy appearance, Freyd quickly recognized the magnitude of the threat, especially in light of their numbers.  Scrawny's thugs had cleared out the locals, but this section of beach had clearly once accommodated dozens if not hundreds of people.  That meant a lot of angry hardware was headed his way, and there were few feasible ways out or around them to escape.  

"That leaves only one option.  We go through them."

By his silence, Montjoy was assumed to concur.

Spoiler

Freyd regains 92 HP from BH.

Calamity Disaster (x12 AoE +6 for hits): 18 EN - (Rested 2nd of 2, Finesse 3, Turn Recovery) = 13 EN.

ID #180745 | BD: 6+6=12 (hit, Fallen +6).  Freyd deals (12*32=384) damage to Animated Chair #1.
ID #180746 | BD: 7+6=13 (hit, Fallen +6).  Freyd deals (12*32=384) damage to Animated Chair #2.
ID #180747 | BD: 1 (miss).  Freyd misses Animated Chair #3
ID #180748 | BD: 7+6=13 (hit, Fallen +6).  Freyd deals (12*32=384) damage to Animated Chair #4.

ID #180747 | MD: 9 (Crit +1).  Animated Chair #3 deals (253-79=174) damage to Freyd.

Freyd, The Whisper in Shadows | HP:1589/1845 | EN:85/183 | DMG:26 | MIT:79 | EVA:4 | ACC:6 | VAMP OFF:184 | HLY:6 | FLN:6 | TOX.VEN 24 | LD:8 | PROSP 3 | BH:92

Animated Chair #1 | HP 0/672 | DMG 252 (228-384)
Animated Chair #2 | HP 0/672 | DMG 252 (288-384)
Animated Chair #3 | HP 228/672 | DMG 252 
Animated Chair #4 | HP 0/672 | DMG 252 (204-384)

Animated Chairs #5, #6 and #7 arrive.

Loot Rolls

ID #180783 (LD: 13+8=21 | CD: 3) - Animated Chair #1

4233*Col
4*T3 Materials
T3 Perfect Armor/Shield #180783a
T3 Perfect Weapon #180783b

ID #180784 (LD: 11+8=19 | CD: 8) - Animated Chair #2

5644*Col
2*T3 Materials
T3 Perfect Armor/Shield 180784a
T3 Perfect Trinket #180784b

ID #180785 (LD: 4+8=12 | CD: 9) - Animated Chair #4

7056*Col
2*T3 Materials
T3 Rare Armor/Shield #180785a
 

[Freyd 0]

Snapping joints and stabbing, sharpened legs greeted him at every turn, but Freyd somehow managed to evade them all.  Dashing forward with all the speed that he could muster, he slashed repeatedly, unleashing a swift, sequence of strikes to form the core maneuver required to unleash his sword art and devastate his opposition.  It was effective, but did not deliver instant victory.  These damnable things were tough, and likely meant to be part of Scrawny's doomsday scenario.  

'Thank goodness I didn't set them off on my way in,' Freyd thought.  That would have been exceedingly bad.  The current situation wasn't much better.   

Rolling, dodging, and even stepping off of his foes, he managed to keep ahead of them, but just barely.  If he could make it passed the edge of the property and back onto the road, he might get clear and back to the portal.  Death by ravenous Muskoka chair wasn't a particularly appealing alternative.

Spoiler

Freyd regains 92 HP from BH.

Calamity Disaster (x12 AoE +8 for hits): 20 EN - (Finesse 3, Turn Recovery) = 16 EN.

ID #180749 | BD: 2+6=8 (hit).  Freyd deals (12*26=312) damage to Animated Chair #3.
ID #180750 | BD: 6+6=12 (hit, Fallen +6).  Freyd deals (12*32=384) damage to Animated Chair #5.
ID #180751 | BD: 5+6=11 (hit).  Freyd deals (12*26=312) damage to Animated Chair #6.
ID #180752 | BD: 5+6=11 (hit).  Freyd deals (12*26=312) damage to Animated Chair #7.

ID #180749 | MD: 6-4=2 (miss)
ID #180750 | MD: 4-4=0 (miss)
ID #180751 | MD: 1 (miss)
ID #180752 | MD: 5-4=1 (miss)

Freyd, The Whisper in Shadows | HP:1681/1845 | EN:69/183 | DMG:26 | MIT:79 | EVA:4 | ACC:6 | VAMP OFF:184 | HLY:6 | FLN:6 | TOX.VEN 24 | LD:8 | PROSP 3 | BH:92

Animated Chair #3 | HP 0/672 | DMG 252 (228-312)
Animated Chair #5 | HP 288/672 | DMG 252 (672-384)
Animated Chair #6 | HP 360/672 | DMG 252 (672-312)
Animated Chair #7 | HP 360/672 | DMG 252 (672-312)

Animated Chair #8 arrives

Loot Rolls

ID #180786 (LD: 15+8=23 | CD: 1) - Animated Chair #3

4233*Col
4*T3 Materials
T3 Perfect Trinket #180786a
T3 Perfect Weapon #180786b
 

[Freyd 0]

One of the things finally caught a break and tripped him as he made to step onto its frame and leap clear.  Instead, Freyd fell flat on his face and found himself swarmed by the clattering mob.  Forced to react on the fly, or a denied one, he grabbed the nearest chair by the arm and slammed it into those surrounding him.  For a moment, he looked like a lion tamer holding a stool to keep an even bigger, angrier mob of stools at bay.  The irony struck him as especially odd when he then turned and smashed the folding chair onto the back of another adjacent one in a move that would make the WWE proud.  It was enough to scatter and disorient his pursuers and allow him to resume his race, even as more animated hardware joined the chase.  Picnic tables and beach umbrellas joined the growing throng, the latter hopping like malevolent and bewitched pogo sticks as they hopped after him.

Spoiler

Freyd regains 92 HP from BH.

Calamity Disaster (x12 AoE +2 for hits): 14 EN - (Finesse 3, Turn Recovery) = 10 EN.

ID #180753 | BD: 1 (miss).  Freyd misses Animated Chair #5.
ID #180754 | BD: 1 (miss).  Freyd misses Animated Chair #6.
ID #180755 | BD: 1 (miss).  Freyd misses Animated Chair #7.
ID #180756 | BD: 8+6=14 (hit, Fallen +6).  Freyd deals (12*32=384) damage to Animated Chair #8.

ID #180753 | MD: 3-4=(-1) (miss)
ID #180754 | MD: 8-4=4 (miss)
ID #180755 | MD: 10 (Crit +2).  Animated Chair #7 deals (254-79=175) damage to Freyd.
ID #180756 | MD: 3-4=(-1) (miss)

Freyd, The Whisper in Shadows | HP:1598/1845 | EN:59/183 | DMG:26 | MIT:79 | EVA:4 | ACC:6 | VAMP OFF:184 | HLY:6 | FLN:6 | TOX.VEN 24 | LD:8 | PROSP 3 | BH:92

Animated Chair #5 | HP 288/672 | DMG 252 
Animated Chair #6 | HP 360/672 | DMG 252 
Animated Chair #7 | HP 360/672 | DMG 252 
Animated Chair #8 | HP 288/672 | DMG 252 (672-384)

 

[Freyd 0]

"Enough!"

A blast of darkness burst forth from his blade, flensing the finish from the group closest to him and shattering their finicky frames.  Some re-assembly would be required.  Their destruction offered a much needed gap as the growing furniture horde threatened to overwhelm him.  

"How can there possibly be this much stuff on a single beach?!"

Look in a mirror, once in a while.  How much experience do you have with vacation spots, ... or direct sunlight?

A grimace earned Montjoy a point, but did nothing to improve his circumstances.  The exit gates were visible in the distance, a hundred feet ahead and behind a wide assortment of buffet tables, benches and water sports equipment that no one was around to enjoy.  Turning his blade to trail behind him, he ran at full speed, hoping to clear the final obstacles as swiftly as possible.  More chair-bug and other wood monstrosities were closing in from both flanks.  Timing was going to be tricky.

Spoiler

Freyd regains 92 HP from BH.

Freyd activates Charge.

Calamity Disaster (x12 AoE +8 for hits): 20 EN - (Finesse 3, Turn Recovery) = 16 EN.

ID #180759 | BD: 8+6=14 (hit, Charge +5, Fallen +6).  Freyd deals (12*37=444) damage to Animated Chair #5.
ID #180760 | BD: 7+6=13 (hit, Charge +5, Fallen +6).  Freyd deals (12*37=444) damage to Animated Chair #6.
ID #180761 | BD: 2+6=8 (hit, Charge +5).  Freyd deals (12*31=372) damage to Animated Chair #7.
ID #180762 | BD: 8+6=14 (hit, Charge +5, Fallen +6).  Freyd deals (12*37=444) damage to Animated Chair #8.

Freyd, The Whisper in Shadows | HP:1690/1845 | EN:43/183 | DMG:26 | MIT:79 | EVA:4 | ACC:6 | VAMP OFF:184 | HLY:6 | FLN:6 | TOX.VEN 24 | LD:8 | PROSP 3 | BH:92

Animated Chair #5 | HP 0/672 | DMG 252 (288-444)
Animated Chair #6 | HP 0/672 | DMG 252 (360-444)
Animated Chair #7 | HP 0/672 | DMG 252 (360-372)
Animated Chair #8 | HP 0/672 | DMG 252 (288-444)

Loot Rolls

ID #180787 (LD: 2+8=10 | CD: 5) - Animated Chair #5

6350*Col
2*T3 Materials
T3 Rare Trinket #180787a

ID #180788 (LD: 2+8=10 | CD: 12) - Animated Chair #6

7761*Col
T3 Rare Trinket #180788a

ID #180789 (LD: 20+8=28 | CD: 3) - Animated Chair #7

5644*Col
2*T3 Materials
T3 Perfect Consumable #180789a
T3 Perfect Consumable #180789b
T3 Perfect Armor/Shield #180789c
T3 Perfect Armor/Shield #180789d

ID #180790 (LD: 5+8=13 | CD: 5) - Animated Chair #8

4233*Col
4*T3 Materials
T3 Rare Weapon #180790a
T3 Uncommon Consumable #180790b
 

[Freyd 0]

So many clamoring creatures were after him, by this point, that the very ground was shaking.  The thundering noise of the stampeding herd of crazed constructs made it difficult to focus, let alone think.  It was also throwing off his aim and rhythm, causing him to miss several otherwise easy targets.  Chairs were leaping at him, now.  A couple of trampolines had joined the fray and were helping the chair bugs leap high into the air.  They landed on their fellows more often than not, adding to the overall sense of frenzied chaos developing around him.

"I just wanted to get paid!  This is insane."  Regardless, it was happening, and he needed to get away.  "Ali and I are going to have a very unpleasant conversation, for him, and assuming that I can actually get out of this mess."

 Darting to the left, Freyd used their mobs' own tricks and took a bounding step off one of the wayward trampolines, sliding across the buffet tables as he landed, spraying fruited and fresh vegetables before him to help clear a path.

Spoiler

Freyd regains 92 HP from BH.

Freyd activates Charge.

Calamity Disaster (x12 AoE +4 for hits): 16 EN - (Finesse 3, Turn Recovery) = 12 EN.

ID #180763 | BD: 1 (miss).  Freyd misses Animated Chair #9.
ID #180764 | BD: 3+6=9 (hit, Charge +5).  Freyd deals (12*31=372) damage to Animated Chair #10.
ID #180765 | BD: 5+6=9 (hit, Charge +5).  Freyd deals (12*26=372) damage to Animated Chair #11.
ID #180766 | BD: 1 (miss).  Freyd misses Animated Chair #12.

ID #180763 | MD: 9 (Crit +1).  Animated Chair #9 deals (253-79=174) damage to Freyd.
ID #180764 | MD: 7-4=3 (miss)
ID #180765 | MD: 6-4=2 (miss)
ID #180766 | MD: 1 (miss)

Freyd, The Whisper in Shadows | HP:1608/1845 | EN:31/183 | DMG:26 | MIT:79 | EVA:4 | ACC:6 | VAMP OFF:184 | HLY:6 | FLN:6 | TOX.VEN 24 | LD:8 | PROSP 3 | BH:92

Animated Chair #9 | HP 672/672 | DMG 252
Animated Chair #10 | HP 300/672 | DMG 252 (672-372)
Animated Chair #11 | HP 300/672 | DMG 252 (672-372)
Animated Chair #12 | HP 672/672 | DMG 252 

 

[Freyd 0]

"No one is ever going to believe me, if I try to describe this." 

Sparing a precious moment to glance behind him, every object in sight seemed to be crawling after him like a moving carpet of sinister, clattering things bent on his destruction.  The image of an Ikea showroom of horror came to mind, but the color schemes were all wrong, and there was a decidedly more rustic character to the furniture currently trying to kill him.  Somehow, the thought of angry Tärnö, Äpplarö and Salthomen chasing after him didn't seem quite as threatening. 

Death by sauna also sounded particularly dreadful, but appropriate given how often he seemed to end up in sticky messes around Aincrad.  Today's little escapade was turning out to be no different as he pulled a pair of grapes and a watermelon slice from his cowl.  They'd been unintentionally picked up during his sprint through the buffet.

Spoiler

Freyd regains 92 HP from BH.

Calamity Disaster (x12 AoE +8 for hits): 20 EN - (Finesse 3, Turn Recovery) = 16 EN.

ID #180767 | BD: 5+6=11 (hit).  Freyd deals (12*26=312) damage to Animated Chair #9.
ID #180768 | BD: 2+6=8 (hit).  Freyd deals (12*26=312) damage to Animated Chair #10.
ID #180769 | BD: 4+6=10 (hit).  Freyd deals (12*26=312) damage to Animated Chair #11.
ID #180770 | BD: 3 +6=9 (hit).  Freyd deals (12*26=312) damage to Animated Chair #12.

ID #180767 | MD: 9 (Crit +1).  Animated Chair #9 deals (253-79=174) damage to Freyd.
ID #180768 | MD: 9 (Crit +1).  Animated Chair #9 deals (253-79=174) damage to Freyd.
ID #180769 | MD: 9 (Crit +1).  Animated Chair #9 deals (253-79=174) damage to Freyd.
ID #180770 | MD: 5-4=1 (miss)

Freyd, The Whisper in Shadows | HP:1178/1845 | EN:15/183 | DMG:26 | MIT:79 | EVA:4 | ACC:6 | VAMP OFF:184 | HLY:6 | FLN:6 | TOX.VEN 24 | LD:8 | PROSP 3 | BH:92

Animated Chair #9 | HP 360/672 | DMG 252 (672-312)
Animated Chair #10 | HP 0/672 | DMG 252 (300-312)
Animated Chair #11 | HP 0/672 | DMG 252 (300-312)
Animated Chair #12 | HP 360/672 | DMG 252 (672-312) 

Loot Rolls

ID #180791 (LD: 1+8=9 | CD: 11) - Animated Chair #10

4939*Col
4*T3 Materials
T3 Rare Trinket #180791a

ID #180792 (LD: 17+8=25 | CD: 7) - Animated Chair #11

9172*Col
4*T3 Materials
T3 Perfect Weapon #180792a
T3 Perfect Weapon #180792b
T3 Perfect Weapon #180792c
 

Note: Loot roll 180791 was accidentally labeled as 'Animated Chair #9', but applied to #10.

[Freyd 0]

Something tried to engulf him in tawny tarp fabric and was promptly sliced into ribbons.  Two steps farther along, a pair of wooden boxes that turned out to be ice chests spilled their contents on the ground before him, hoping he'd slip up, but to no avail.  Another one of the chair bugs chasing him flung itself at him and was promptly whomped for its trouble.  

He could see the finish line, now, just ahead through the maelstrom of maddened things that was desperately converging on his position and hoping to snap, clap and smother him to pieces.  There were far too many to fight.  Flight and survival formed the only viable option.  A whirling leap and ground smash cleared a few more feet of ground and left only one particularly nasty little fold-up before him.  It seemed to be glaring at him from the cup holder in each arm, daring him to try something.

Spoiler

Freyd regains 92 HP from BH.

Calamity Disaster (x12 AoE +4 for hits): 16 EN - (Finesse 3, Turn Recovery) = 12 EN.

ID #180771 | BD: 9 (Crit +1, Holy +6).  Freyd deals (12*33=396) damage to Animated Chair #9.
ID #180772 | BD: 4+6=10 (hit).  Freyd deals (12*26=312) damage to Animated Chair #12.

Vampiric (Off) procs and Freyd regains 184 HP.

ID #180771 | MD: 3-4=(-1) (miss)
ID #180772 | MD: 3-4=(-1) (miss)

Freyd, The Whisper in Shadows | HP:1454/1845 | EN:3/183 | DMG:26 | MIT:79 | EVA:4 | ACC:6 | VAMP OFF:184 | HLY:6 | FLN:6 | TOX.VEN 24 | LD:8 | PROSP 3 | BH:92

Animated Chair #9 | HP 0/672 | DMG 252 (360-396)
Animated Chair #12 | HP 48/672 | DMG 252 (360-312)

Loot Rolls

ID #180793 (LD: 13+8=21 | CD: 12) - Animated Chair #9

9172*Col
2*T3 Materials
T3 Perfect Trinket #180793a

[Freyd 0]

'Fine,' he said to himself.  After this much absurdity, he was done.

Racing forward, Freyd felt the charging of wrath building in his blade.  From above, it looked like a supernova had gone off, scattering every imaginable form of table and seating amenity known to man in a blast wave.  Only the swing and click of a white picket fence gate signaled that he had achieved his goal and escaped, racing back towards Coral and fuming to give Ali a piece of his mind.  

When the sand and dust cleared, everything on the beach had returned to normal, reset as if nothing had ever been amiss and waiting for the next unlucky victim to take his chances on the thief's vacation gauntlet.  Freyd, meanwhile, was busy cursing the amount of sand in his boots as he slapped him gloved hand on the portal frame, heading back to where this mess had started.

Spoiler

Freyd regains 92 HP from BH.

Straight (x2): 2 EN - (Finesse 3) = 1 EN. offset by turn recovery

ID #180773 | BD: 10 (Crit +2, Holy +6).  Freyd deals (2*34=68) damage to Animated Chair #12.

Freyd, The Whisper in Shadows | HP:1546/1845 | EN:3/183 | DMG:26 | MIT:79 | EVA:4 | ACC:6 | VAMP OFF:184 | HLY:6 | FLN:6 | TOX.VEN 24 | LD:8 | PROSP 3 | BH:92

Animated Chair #12 | HP 0/672 | DMG 252 (48-68)

Loot Rolls

ID #180794 (LD: 3+8=11 | CD: 5) - Animated Chair #12

4233*Col
4*T3 Materials
T3 Rare Weapon #180794a
T3 Uncommon Consumable #180794b

***

Thread Rewards:

8 SP (2 pages, +1 event, +3 quest, +2 sub-dungeon)

163936*Col (incl. 800 for pages and 8,000 for quest reward)
50*T3 Materials
T3 Perfect Armor/Shield #180774a
T3 Perfect Weapon #180774b
T3 Perfect Armor/Shield #180775a
T3 Perfect Weapon #180775b
T3 Perfect Weapon #180775c
T3 Perfect Weapon #180776a
T3 Perfect Weapon #180776b
T3 Perfect Weapon #180776c
T3 Rare Trinket #180777a
(22) Intermediate Dungeon Map #180778
T3 Perfect Trinket #180779a
(22) Intermediate Dungeon Map #180780
T3 Rare Trinket #180781a
T3 Rare Consumable #180782a
T3 Rare Weapon #180782b
T3 Perfect Armor/Shield #180783a
T3 Perfect Weapon #180783b
T3 Perfect Armor/Shield 180784a
T3 Perfect Trinket #180784b
T3 Rare Armor/Shield #180785a
T3 Perfect Trinket #180786a
T3 Perfect Weapon #180786b
T3 Rare Trinket #180787a
T3 Rare Trinket #180788a
T3 Perfect Consumable #180789a
T3 Perfect Consumable #180789b
T3 Perfect Armor/Shield #180789c
T3 Perfect Armor/Shield #180789d
T3 Rare Weapon #180790a
T3 Uncommon Consumable #180790b
T3 Rare Trinket #180791a
T3 Perfect Weapon #180792a
T3 Perfect Weapon #180792b
T3 Perfect Weapon #180792c
T3 Perfect Trinket #180793a
T3 Rare Weapon #180794a
T3 Uncommon Consumable #180794b