[SP-F6] <Calming the Soul>, Lawfer's Demons, Completed!!!

[Lawfer 0]

Down on Floor 1, Lawfer heard of a certain quest that would allow him to gain a rare unique skill. "I figure if I get this now I'll be able to move up the ranks and get to the front lines quicker." He stated to himself as he made his way to the teleport pad in the middle of Starting City. "Floor 6, Amazon." he stated as he was engulfed in light and instantaneously transported to Amazon city, the main city on the Jungle floor. 'Now to find the Waterfall of Sage' Lawfer thought to himself as he pressed forward. The thought of riding himself of his demon's and moving forward with life sounded sublime. The supposedly hidden quest actually wasn't too hidden, after asking around the NPC's in the region had pointed out the location of the waterfall that he needed to travel to. It wasn't a long walk off, he only had to traverse a few miles of humid, hot terrain to find himself at the waterfall. Pulling up his user interface he read the quest description. "So I need to sit in front of the waterfall and face my demons?" He asked himself.

The waterfall seemed exceptionally normal, there were flat rocks that faced the waterfall that he could sit on, and due the the break in the tree canopy he had plenty of light. "Well lets just see what this is all about." Lawfer stated as he jumped on atop on of the flat rocks and set his Pudao to his side. 

Edited September 5, 2015 by Lawfer

[Lawfer 0]

There was an eerie feeling about the waterfall as Lawfer squatted then sat down atop the rock. This was the first time he took on a quest that didn't require him battle hoards of enemies. Crossing his legs, he stared into the waterfall. Nothing was happening. 'Most quests begin immediately.' he thought. 'whats this ones deal?' He couldn't figure it out.  Raising his right hand, he scrolled down on the user interface. Pulling up the quest once more he reread it. 'this is a quest about meditating right? I guess ill try that for a bit.' he thought as he closed his eyes. 'I need to stop thinking and just focus on what needs to be done..... Focus.....Focus....' he continued to try to focus on his thoughts to no avail. He was going to be here awhile.

[Lawfer 0]

Thirty minutes had passed and Lawfer's mind raced trying to figure out what exactly he was doing wrong when a voice broke the silence. "Hey MORON! Did you think it would be that simple?" Slowly opening his Lawfer stared forward looking seeing a black silhouette in the waterfall. "So now you see me. I've been watching you this whole time and it takes you this long to just open your eyes and see me. You've got to be kidding me right? For as smart as you are you are so blindly dumb. No wonder your father left you to rot after mother died." Anger rose in Lawfer's heart as he stared down the black apparition who's eyes grew steadily more crimson. "You do know who I am right?" It stated as it grinned back at Lawfer.

[Lawfer 0]

'What the hell is that thing.' was the thought that was racing through Lawfer's mind. "You really haven't figured it out? What a dumb***." It finally triggered in his mind. It knew what he was thinking, there was only one explanation. "It took you 33 and 2/3 minutes for you to come to that conclusion you know?" It paused. "Well what can I say, when logic fails..." Lawfer was cut off. "Logic? You're preaching about logic. You're stuck in a virtual world and you are preaching about logic. Really now?" "Well.." "What can you say. I get it." A more ghastly smile creeped onto the apparitions face. "You know your the reason why dad left right? He knew that he couldn't trust you with his secret." "What the hell are you blabbing on about?" Lawfer responded.

[Lawfer 0]

"You know exactly what I'm talking about. You cant lie to me you little s**t. Why dad left." "Dad left because he was a coward and you know that. He couldn't bear the thought of seeing mother in such a horrible state and he left because he couldn't hack it." "Nuh ugh, nuh ugh! You know the real reason why and you just don't want to say it." "Oh yeah? And what is it? You think I haven't thought all of it through? Huh?!!!" Lawfer yelled and began clinching his fist. His knuckles becoming white from the pressure. "I will say that you aren't as smart as you think you are? You're so confident of that fact when its just a facade." "Facade? Facade? Really? I am one of the smartest people of this generation. I can retain anything, you know that just as well as I do!" He responded.

[Lawfer 0]

"Poor little Jared... Still too naive to realize the truth. For as smart as you are you are so so so so blind. When was it that you started blaming dad for everything? When was it that you you started to hating him and started pushing him away?" Lawfer was at a loss for words he didn't know what to say. "It sure as h*ll wasn't when mother was at deaths door. It was well before that wasn't it? Wasn't it Jared... Mother was sick long before dad was an absentee father you know that." "Enough!!!" Lawfer yelled as he grasped his Pudao. "Really? Your going to try to use that against me?" The shadow stated as it raised its hand, its crimson eyes burned. A moment later Lawfer's Pudao flew away from his hand. 

[Lawfer 0]

"Jared, oh Jared. You are not in the same realm of power as me. Unlike you I have no limits. Your pathetic little brain with all its thinking power cant stand up to the truth. You pushed dad away, you kept him away from mother when she was dying. You are the reason why you are stuck in this game and you are the reason why you are going to die in this world." It began to cackle as it watched the expression on Lawfer's face turn from rage to self pity. "You who is so arrogant about his own intelligence can't even comprehend how powerless you really are. What a pathetic fool..." This was the first time ever, Lawfer was at a lack for words. As he stared into himself, he couldn't even fight back.

[Lawfer 0]

"Do you know when I was born Jared? Do you know when you created me? Do you have any the slightest clue how you created me? Of course you don't, only I do, only I do." The specter asked, it was growing evermore visibly dark. What started out as a weak shadow had began to darken and turn into a black shade. Lawfer sat staring, completely speechless as if his will was completely broken. "You don't know the answer do you? Really? The almighty mind of Jared Springfield is broken, with it along with your spirit? What a weakling! I can't believe that you are the one that rules this body of ours. Well, not for long anyways and there is nothing you can do to stop it. Poor, poor little Jared. You know you never really loved mother either right? How could you love her? She was never as smart as us. How can you love someone who doesn't even understand us?" Lawfer's mind was waivering, his body began feeling heavy.

[Lawfer 0]

Lawfer had never faced someone like this. He knew everything he did. He was him, in a sense at least. "We loved mother you know that." Lawfer replied to the specter, with what little fight that was left in him. "NO WE DIDN'T! Don't lie to me. Don't lie to US." Lawfer's deep blue eyes began to gloss over and became shallow. "How could we ever love someone as unintellegent as her? That's impossible. The likes of her has never been welcomed for us. There has never been a woman that we even came close to loving." Lawfer thought back to all the women he came to love in the past. Most notably, the last woman he dated before SAO, Veronica. Lawfer believed she was just as smart as he was the only problem was she never wanted to have a family and settle-down. Which in the long run for Lawfer wouldn't have never turned out well so he broke it off. "Veronica was a MORON! An imbecile! You know that deep down. She wasn't even smart enough to lie to you to keep you around. We both know that's what she wanted, but she had to tell you the truth and you had to leave." "That doesn't even make sense!" Lawfer replied.

[Lawfer 0]

"Yes it does!" The black ghast responded in a fit of rage. "She never wanted to end the relationship. She wanted to keep you around because she loved you. But she just couldn't lie to you! She couldn't lie to you keep you around. If she was as intelligent as you believe she would have lied to you to keep you around for herself." Lawfer understood what the specter was saying but it's argument didn't have any merit. "No merit Jared? Really? Obviously it does if I am thinking it. I am you remember you unintelligent, pitiful boy." Lawfer was confused, if what he was saying was true then this whole time Lawfer was lying to himself about how he felt about the world, and how he felt about Aincrad. "That's right Jared, you're finally understanding it aren't you?"

[Lawfer 0]

The black reflection began growing bigger. It was at least twice the size it was when Lawfer opened his eyes. "You know you never answered my question Jared. Do you know when I was was born? Do you know how I was born? Do you still have no clue?" The apparition paused for a moment. "I think you do! I think you do! I think you doooooo-oooooo!" Lawfer began to think back. 'What the h**l is he talking about? I have no clue when this filth was born.' "Really Jared? Filth, you think yourself to be filth? That's rich. So, so Rich. Like our dad. You know what I'm talking about now. At what point in time did you deem the rest of the world more unintellegent than you? Filth... When did the world become filth to you? All of it filthy, filthy, filthy rich."

[Lawfer 0]

Lawfer thought back, only at one point in time could his so called dark side be born. It was the moment he realized he was smarter than his dad. When he was fifteen, Lawfer was working at his dad's litigation law-firm as an intern. His dad set him on a path to follow in his footsteps at a young age and by the time he was fifteen he realized that Lawfer was able to help. In accordance with his fathers wishes, Lawfer joined him in his fathers firm as a researcher to help upcoming low profile cases. Wanting to help his dad on higher profile cases, Lawfer began researching a case that his father didn't want him to touch. After repeatedly refusing Lawfer's help, and claiming that Lawfer wasn't ready for the big leagues his father ignored Lawfer's case files and advice. A month later his father lost one of the biggest cases in his career, and Lawfer blamed him for not listening to him because of his pride. "Bingo!"

[Lawfer 0]

"You hit the jackpot you little ****! I told you I am always right." This shook Lawfer to his very core. He was exactly as his reflection said. "You are finally understanding. I am you. I will always be you!" Lawfer's eyes began to gloss over once more. The very last bit of himself was being sucked into the specter. "And after that point, you little s**t stain, you always believed you were smarter than everyone and above everyone. That's why dad left. He couldn't stand to be around someone who was smarter than him and better than him. That's also why you never really loved mother. She was unworthy of being mother. She could never really love us. How could she? She never understood our greatness. She was simply a hack of a dancer that got knocked up and had to stop doing the thing she loved the most because she had us."

[Lawfer 0]

'That's not right. Mother stopped dancing because she wanted to start a family. Dad and mother just started dating when she quit dancing.' The shade halted its taunts. It had realized it slipped up and immediately began to back track. "You know Im right, You know I'm right. Mother only told you that so she could keep you around while she was dying. The selfish little b**/" "No she wasn't, you know that because I know that. The dates dont match up. For as smart as we are, you should be able to do simple addition. I wasn't born for a year after she left the business. Just what are you?" He replied, cutting the shade off before he finished yet another insult to his departed mother. "You know what I am. I am the truth you're so afraid of."

[Lawfer 0]

"No, the truth is mother was never that kind of person to just keep someone around because she needed them. If that was the case she would have dragged dad home from the office to take care of her. We know that." He stated, as he yelled at the shade. It's size began diminishing. It was still larger than it was in the beginning but it no longer towered Lawfer. "Jared you piece of filth! You know I'm right, yes you do." "Mother was the only one who took care of us. She was the only one that allowed us to enjoy some semblance of life when we were kids. But you wouldn't know that would you? You were born after that." Lawfer was beginning to understand his dark reflection even more at this point. It was giving Lawfer all the answers, he was just too distraught to listen to them.

Edited September 5, 2015 by Lawfer

[Lawfer 0]

"We were too smart for Veronica, Jared, we know that. She couldn't even hold onto us, because we were better than her. We know that Jared, we do." The shade retorted as it shrunk to the same size as Lawfer once again. "No, Veronica was truthful with us when we wanted something more. She wasn't ready for what we wanted, and we couldn't give her what she needed because we wanted something completely different. You're not even making a logical argument anymore." Lawfer exclaimed as he watched the specters body become even a solid grey color. Lawfer was becoming ever more aware of what the shade truly was. "No, No, No your stupid little boy! Do your really believe yourself to be smarter than your darkness?"

[Lawfer 0]

"You can't be! We are each other! That's why dad left us because we were too smart for him. We could do his job better than he could. He left because he was embarrassed and jealous of us. Jealous that we were more intelligent than him. Embarrassed that we surpassed him in what he knew best. Isn't that why you chose your new name Jared? To spit in the face of our father? The man who abandoned us because WE knew tHe LaW beTTer than eVen Him? You know im right, you KnOW we'RE right!" The specter scream as his eyes began to fade from the deep crimson they once were to the faint red that they were now. "JAred you Know its the truth don't you?"

[Lawfer 0]

"Dad left because he was a coward, you know that. We know that. He stayed away because he couldn't stand to see mother crippled from illness. To him it was easier to run away and stay at the office than to see mother fade away. I, I mean we almost stayed away too. Don't you remember? Because I do. I thought I was so much smarter than dad because I actually stayed around and got to learn about mother. We learned a lot from her that year. We knew that we were more intelligent than her, she knew it too. That didn't stop her from loving us any less. I, I mean we know that she loved us even more because of that. She was the only one that actually praised us for for intelligence. Heck, she was the only one that gave us fiction novels so we could escape just a little bit when we were younger. You need to stop insulting her memory now." Lawfer said with a smile as he reminisced about the past his his mom in his thoughts.

[Lawfer 0]

"Ok, ok, ok Jared. I'll guess I will leave her alone now." The reflection said. It was still cloudy, its eyes still had a hint of red in them. "You know you can never get rid of me. I am you, I am the dark side of you that will always be here. I will come back and take over us sooner or later. I will be the one in control of us. I am never going to stop pursuing becoming the one in control, Jared." Its red eyes began to burn a brighter red. The shades words were resonating within Lawfer. "Jared, I want to be in control, you need to give me the spot light, I deserve it. You owe me that much for making sure you are smarter than everyone else. Let me take control Jared. Give me control Jared!"

[Lawfer 0]

"If you and I are the we are the same person that you keep on claiming to be, we know that I am not Jared anymore. You are right that we chose our name to spite our dad. Subconsciously or consciously. Our name is Lawfer now. You know what it means right? Of course you do. It means to bear the law. Our new Law that we will create in this world. Please do not place us in the same category as Jared Springfield." Lawfer paused for a moment to observe his reflection in the falling water. "You and I are we. We are of the same mind now. We are together in this world together, are We not?" He asked his reflection. "I don't want to share it with you Jared. I want us to be me and only me." the reflection responded.