[SP-F4] Chapter 1 Summary - A Hard Road

[Emerath 0]

Emerath sat in his shop, in a chair beside the fire, sipping his tea. He hadn't crafted recently. He had locked the doors. And he had shut himself away from the world. There was only a handful of people he would have opened that door for, but all of them were gone, off having their own adventures for the evening. He took another sip. He had been staring at the fire for hours. He hadn't gotten any guild work done, or even given any thought to any of that. Most of all, Emerath was tired. World weary and trying his best to just keep taking the next step forward. But even the strongest people sometimes have to sit down and rest. He smiled a bit despite himself. Rest was something he hadn't had in a long time. He was always going, going, going. He never slept. He never even really felt. He just kept passing through the world like a mist, trying his best to stay alive, while being the best person he could be. But... who was that, exactly?

[Emerath 0]

Emerath first thought of Teion. The first person he had met in the game. Oh, what a realization it had been to realize that they were trapped here. But, she made Emerath realize that he wasn't alone. Even though all he wanted to do was run away from her and avoid her. Emerath sighed and took another sip. He had let Teion down. Not only due to their past, but their present as well. That was about when he had realized he hadn't seen the woman since they had gone out hunting and Emerath finally told her the truth. She had deserved better than what Emerath had done. Even if he was trying to protect her, he ended up hurting her more. Though, could he be sure of that? Would Endilix hurting her have felt any better?

What ifs, and could haves, were not Emerath's forte, to be sure. He let that go, and simply reflected on the future with his friend. She had mentioned going on a quest with him and his brother, and he would be hopeful of more to come. The first step of many, for forgiveness of what he had done to wrong her, and of a brighter future together, both in Aincrad and outside of it.

[Emerath 0]

Emerath next thought of his brother, as he poured himself another cup of tea. He wasn't sure what it was about being a twin that made life so interesting. All it had ever seemed to cause was unnecessary drama, not to mention his brother had used him and their identical appearances on many occasions. They had always walked a fine line together, and it wasn't until it finally snapped that Emerath found himself wishing he could go back to those days. The days of being inseparable, of playing the game of "who is who" together. And just altogether being... together. He supposed that was the most painful part. Endilix and Emerath had grown so far apart. So distant. But why? Why had his brother forsaken him so? Why didn't Endilix look for him when they got into the game? Most importantly... why had Emerath never asked until now?

[Emerath 0]

Emerath stared into the flames, his thoughts beginning to run amok as he tried to make sense of it all. Emerath couldn't blame Flints for his brother's absence. Endilix had never gone to seek out his brother. Endilix would've known Emerath's username. He had used the same username for years, and there was no reason for SAO to be any different. He gave a sigh and sipped his tea again. "Dael should've looked for me. Messaged me. Contacted me... and instead we found each other by chance...." Emerath said to himself as he stared into the flames, almost wishing they could give him an answer. He sighed, but then he remembered a quest that Endilix had gone on with him, and he looked up, remembering the conversation they had had that day. Endilix had been afraid. He had kicked himself for entering the game. And Emerath reassured him that no, Emerath needed him here. Emerath needed his brother's shield to survive this death game. Emerath smiled and leaned back in the chair, sipping his tea once more. "The problem is, he cared too much..."

[Emerath 0]

Emerath sat in silence for quite a while longer, considering if he should send a message to his brother. Things had been rocky between Endilix and well... everyone, for quite some time now given what had happened with Flints, and he was trying his best to give Endilix space. The thought of messaging him, despite that he is right next door is... well. It's silly. But I don't want to upset him... he thought to himself a bit forlornly. Admittedly, Emerath had missed his brother quite a bit in all of this, and not even from recent events, but even as he had gone off and had his little thing with Flints. There had been little time for Emerath in them, and so a part of him wasn't even all that upset that his brother was available again. Except for the part where we wasn't, due to his grief. Emerath sighed and closed his messaging system. He wouldn't send Endilix a message. Endilix would need to come to terms with what had happened, and Emerath wouldn't be able to affect that.

[Emerath 0]

Emerath's thoughts began to drift to Flints, and upon thinking about it he immediately wished to dispel the thoughts. The woman was a bit of an enigma in Emerath's life. Upon having first met her, he hated her, but almost as if a complete contrast to Emerath himself his brother absolutely fell in love with the woman. Not only was that odd, but it had caused a strange rift between the brothers. Emerath had never truly disliked Flints, no, quite the opposite over time. Despite that he had tried to kill her, she had become a rather good friend to the man, and he had come to trust her in time. But unfortunately, her care for Emerath and his brother seemed to dissipate, almost overnight. Emerath squeezed his cup, his hands shaking a bit at the thought.

[Emerath 0]

Emerath tried his best to relax a bit, trying to let his thoughts leave that behind. It wasn't easy, however, as he looked over at Mist and that quest they had done together came flooding back into his mind. Together, Emerath and Flints had found both of their familiars, and that had created a lot of memories between the two of them. They had gone through Flint's Martial Arts training together. And then, she had thrown it all away to hurt his brother. Now granted, in the grand scheme of things that barely hurt Emerath, but the idea that she would go that far still stung him. Though, Emerath supposed, that had ultimately been the difference in what little forgiveness that Flints had managed to earn. Emerath managed to calm himself and sip from his tea with a sigh.